WDC Frontliners Novel Review forum

Title: "Invalid Item" 

Chapter: "Invalid Entry" 

Author: J.D. Brown

Plot: Ooooo, a breakthrough! So Jen can fly and walk through walls like the rest of the vampyrs. I suspected this would happen but not so soon.
We also found out a little more about the history of the Vampyrs but nothing that really intrigued me. I’m sure we’ll get into it more soon.
I didn’t realize that ‘blood lust’ was literal lust until this chapter and I was excited when Jen decided that Jesu would be hers. Her having to fight off this lust every time she drinks should be quite interesting.

Style & Voice: Everything was fine. I really got into this chapter, though it was REALLY long without a break anywhere to give a reader pause.

Scene/Setting:I really liked how you described the act of becoming invisible. Having had you first describe it from someone elses POV it was really nice to see how it actually happened and what it feels like. I also really like the idea that she can only feel when she’s in this state, which should make for some interesting scenes to come.

Characters: Love ‘em! But I can’t believe that Jen doesn’t realize Jesu is the cat! It’s gonna be good when she finds out. Who knows what she’ll have confessed to him by then!

Grammar: There was a bunch of misused words in this chapter and a few typoes. They’re all noted below.

Just My Personal Opinion: Gosh, I have no idea who Jen is gonna get together with! Is this gonna be a love triangle? You’ve really got me guessing and that’s great. I can’t wait to find out more!

Hugs,
Grace

Line-by-Line:

NOTE: Comments in blue, grammar edits in green, lines I want to bring to your attention in red, and misspellings/unnecessary words/lines x'd out.




Night had fallen over the castle. Silver moonlight scattered through the tiny window above my bed, making the colors and details of my room more vibrant. I thought for sure I would feel tired, having been awake for almost twenty-four hours now, but my eyelids weren’t the least bit heavy.

The deafening silence in my room left me bored within minutes. I hated that I couldn’t keep tabs on the others from here, but loved that they couldn’t hear me either. I didn’t know what to do. I owned nothing in this place other than a change of clothes, toothbrush, and deodorant that rested in my backpack. The wardrobe and nightstand where empty. All I had was the riddle Jesu left me with.

Give my brother what he wants. Choose wisely. The right story will earn your freedom.

His words played over and over in my mind until I was almost certain I had deciphered the meaning. Jesu wanted me to educate myself. Make up a lie, but make sure it was a good one. It had to be so believable, even Leena wouldn’t know I was lying. In addition, it had to be a lie that made my existence insignificant to Jalmari, so he wouldn’t see any need to keep me around. Only then, when Jalmari had his answer, would I be free to go home.

But I couldn’t even begin to imagine a lie that would work and it didn’t help that I was a terrible actress anyway. I didn’t know why I was here or why Jalmari didn’t just kill me in the alley like he wanted to. I didn’t know why I had become like them. All I knew was that Jalmari wanted to know how just as much as I did.

Claws tapping against glass drew my attention to the round window. The black cat sat just outside.

“How did you get out there? Ha, I wish I could fit out that window.” I stood on my toes on the mattress to reach the window. Pulling the glass pane up, the black creature glided down onto my bed.

“Hey little guy, went hunting did you?” I smiled as the cat rolled onto his back, wanting his belly scratched. I rubbed his tummy, scratching my nails into his fur. He closed his eyes and purred. I didn’t feel as silly talking to the cat knowing no one could hear me.

“You know, cat, I can take you back to Chicago with me when I get out of here. Would you like that, kitty?”

The cat cocked his head toward me and opened one eye.

“I bet you would. Yeah, I bet you would! We have more pigeons than you’d know what to do with. And rats. You can hunt them all day if you want. You don’t have to stay here with the scary vampires, no…”

Closing his eyes, the cat purred while listening to my baby-talk.

I groaned. “I wish I did know how to get out of here. This family is insane. You know that though. You hide whenever the they come. You don’t like them either, do you?”

“Meow?” He looked at me with wide eyes.

“That’s because they’re jerks,” I scrunched my face. “You know what they did to me? Well … I suppose it doesn’t matter now. The important thing is finding a way home.” I sighed. “I miss my boyfriend, little cat.” It was the truth and it felt amazing saying it aloud. My secrete was safe with this animal.

“I miss him … so much. (No! why does she still miss that cheating loser?! I hope she gets over him soon.) I didn’t even get to say good-bye or tell him how I felt … And now I’m, well, here.” I fell back on the bed and closed my eyes. My heart ached, remembering Anthony, our last moments together. He left me. He said he didn’t want to break up, but he left me anyway. Moved out and everything. He said he needed time to think.

I hadn’t thought much about it. I didn’t allow myself to. I assumed I had plenty to talk to him about it later, after we both blew off some steam and settled down. But that time was taken from me.

“Jalmari stole it,” I spoke aloud to myself. Opening my eyes to look at the cat, I now realized he was licking my hand as though to comfort me.

“That’s sweet, cat, but I can’t feel a thing. Jalmari stole my ability to feel as well. He ruined everything. I probably lost my job by now. My friends, my mom …” Did they know I was gone? Where they looking for me? What did they think? My stomach knotted, leaving me homesick.

The cat sat up, narrowed his eyes, and slowly gazed around the room. He whipped his head at me and meowed.

“Leave me alone, I’m tired of petting you.” I turned onto my side.

The cat grabbed my sleeve with his teeth and pulled at my top.

“What? Stop that, geeze. I thought only dogs did that.”

He meowed demandingly.

“Go away.” I shooed it with my hand. The thing bit me. I felt little more that a pin prick, (awkward. Something missing here?) but it was annoying. I scowled at the cat, bearing my teeth. He glared back at me and then hissed, his ears folded back flat on his head.

“Okay, I’ve had enough of you. This is why I don’t have pets, now out!” Making my way to the door, I opened it and flailed my hands at the creature. “Go on, get lostcomma damn cat.”

It approached the door slowly, with calculated steps, but stopped to sit and stare at me mid-way between the bed and the door.

“Go! Out!” I pointed.

He casually turned his head away and lifted his nose. Narrowing his bright green eyes at me, the cat tackled the cuff of my pants and pulled them towards the doorway with his teeth.

I put my hands on my hips. “Oh, what? You trying to kick me out of my room?”

The cat let go of my pants and nodded his little head.

My jaw dropped. I stared back at the animal. “Did you … did you just nod at me?”

He bobbed his head up and down.

“You … you can understand what I’m saying?”

The cat nodded.

“Stop that!”

He cocked his head. “Meow?”

I poked my head into the hall and looked around. When I didn’t see or hear anyone, I close the door and faced the cat. “What’s two plus two?”

The creature meowed four times.

“Holly shit! What are you, like a magic familiar (‘magic familiar’? Is that right?)or something?”

He blinked up at me.

I crouched down to pat his head. “Okay, little guy. I know how hard it is to get help around here, so I’ll tell you what; I’ll help you out if you promise not to bite me anymore, deal?”

He nodded.

I took a deep breath. “This is so weird. Okay, what do you need help with?”

The furry thing pulled on the leg of my pants.

“Uh … you want me to follow you?”

The cat nodded.

I sighed. “You’re not going to get me into more trouble, are you?”

He shook his head.

“Alright, lead the way then, little one.” I opened the door. He trotted down the hall out across the fourth wing, every once in a while turning back to see if I was still following. He led me into the corridor going back toward the first wing.

“Cat, I can’t see in here,” I complained when we got to the pitch black center of the narrow hall. “Wait up for me.”

He stopped walking.

I dragged my fingers along the stone wall as I followed the scent of wet fur. I knew how insane this was but, compared to vampires, hanging out with a cat wasn’t didn’t seem all that bad.

“MEOW!” The cat screamed when I accidentally stepped on him.

“Oh! I’m sorry, little guy, are you alright?”

“Rrrr.”

“Hey, don’t get mad at me. I told you I can’t see.” I followed the pitter-patter of his paws the rest of the way. Together, we raced across the kitchen, down the dining room, and into the ballroom.

I slowed to a stop in the middle of the room to look at a couple of young woman who dusted the granite statues and polished the floor. They must have been ‘the help’ Jesu spoke of before. They ignored me as they worked in silence. I knew it was rude to stare but I couldn’t help it. They looked like me, completely white save for their black hair and black eyes.

I approached the woman nearest me. “Hey, who bit you?”

She stopped dusting the marble man, but kept her gaze down as she spoke. “Anoa sinun anteeksianto, arvoisa rouva.”

“What?”

The cat was at my heels again, tugging my pants. “Okay, I’m going.”

He leaped across the ballroom and up the staircase. I followed him, taking the stairs two at a time. I expected to be out of breath when we reached the second floor, but wasn’t. The cat continued up the stairs to the right. I begun began to follow but froze in my tracks as my ears picked up Jalmari’s and Leena’s voice. Jalmari and Leena’s voices. The two bickered in some harsh language. My mind told me their voices should have been muffled, but I could clearly hear every word. Leena was much louder than Jalmari and spoke a hundred words per minute. Jalmari stabbed a harsh word in for every dozen she said first. Crap. I wish I knew what they were saying.
“Meow?” The cat looked over his shoulder at me.

“Shhh! We can’t go into the second wing; Jalmari and Leena are in there!

The cat rolled his eyes at me.

I cocked an eyebrow and put my hands on my hips. “This is as far as I go, cat. I’m not going to go looking for trouble. Come on; let’s go back to my room. I’ll scratch your belly.”

He shook his head and disappeared around the corner.

“No … damn.” I smacked my palm against my forehead and slid my hand down my face. Great. I am not going after him. If that dumb animal wants to get himself in trouble, he’s on his own. I turned to head back down the stairs. I have enough problems as it is. No way am I going in there and risking my life a third time! But I couldn’t just leave the little guy alone. Besides, he seemed to know exactly where he was going. Maybe he knew a secret way out. I stopped and let out a sigh. Crap. Okay, cat, I’m coming. Geeze, I better not regret this later.

Tip-toeing down the hall and around the corner, I was as silent as possible. The cat stood five feet away in front of a large door. As I crept over, the cat reached up and patted the door with his paws.

Grasping the handle, I looked down at the creature. He nodded. I opened the door. He ran inside and I followed, gently closing the door behind me.

“Okay,” I whispered. “Now what?” I looked about the room. Glass shelves crowded with dusty books lined the bleached limestone walls. The white marble floor sparkled as I stepped farther into the room. The smell of old paper and worn leather encircled me as I went all the way to the edge of a balcony and leaned over the wooden handrail. The vast room was open and I could see all the way down to the floor, two levels below me. I was in a three story library. “Wow.”

“Meow?”

“Hmm?” I almost forgot about the cat. “Right. Go on.”

He ran down an aisle and made his way to the back of the room, to a set of stairs leading down to the second and first floor of the library. Down here, Rococo Era paintings of pale men with onyx colored eyes watched me from behind brass frames.

Two red velvet armchairs sat snug around a rectangular coffee table in front of a large limestone mantle. Plush velvet curtains (’plush’ makes me think of, like, a pillow or chair. Plush curtains makes me think ’lumpy’.) draped elegantly over a wall-sized window pane. I wanted to pull back the thick curtain and see what the forest looked like from down here.

“Meow.”

I turned, distracted by the damn (Seems unnecessary here. Is she mad at him?) cat. “What now?”

He stood balancing on top of large, ancient looking books, high up on a shelf two rows down. With his paw, he tried to push one out.

“Careful with those, don’t make a mess …” I spoke too late. Three large leather-bound novels crashed down on the marble floor. “Oh, now you’ve done it. Jalmari would have heard that for sure.”

The cat huffed at me, shaking his head. He leaped down and landed on the book with the blue cover. “Meow.” He pranced around and pawed at it.

“What? You want me to read you a story?” I snickered, but the cat nodded his head. I rolled my eyes. “I don’t have time for stories right now.” This was becoming ridiculous. I followed the pipsqueak animal all the way to this room thinking it was in trouble when it really just wanted a bed time story. Bending over and lifting the massive novel to re-shelf it, I noticed the title:

“The Evolution of the Vampyre: A practical approach to the anthropology of Man’s Other Cousin”
By Dr. Gerald Flückinger

“What in the …” I flipped through the pages and scanned the tiny text. It wasn’t a novel. It was a science journal. I looked at the cat. “Are you for real?”

“Meow?” He leapt onto another shelf a patted the spine of another book. Before he had a chance to dump it on the floor like the first one, I pulled it out. Another journal. This one was called “The Biology and Application of the Vampyre Diet” by Dr. Stanley Bedford.

“Meow.” The cat was on another pile of books, patting one with his paw.

I gawked at him. “You want me to read all of these?” I pulled the third book out. It must have weighed ten pounds.

The cat nodded.
“Why?”
He leaped into my arms, almost causing me to drop everything. I grunted. “Uh … done?”
He nodded.
I rolled my eyes. “Are you sure you don’t want me to read that four-thousand page book bound in rubber-bands over there?” (Paragraphs need spacing.)

He cocked his head and look at the thick book he had drop dropped on the floor earlier and then smiled and nodded.

“Whatever, you read it. I’m going back to my room. I’d like to get as far away from Jalmari and Leena as possible.”

He jumped off and followed behind me as we made our way back to the forth wing. As I stepped into my room, the cat zoomed past my feet and leaped onto the bed. I closed the door while the black fur-ball made himself comfortable on my bed.

Setting the journals down on the nightstand, I made myself cozy on the bed as well, propping a pillow against the wall and leaning back into it. My fuzzy friend rolled onto his back, bumping his side against mine, and stretched out.

I looked down at the adorable yet pain-in-the-butt animal and smiled. “You know, I wish I knew your name.”

He looked at me with big, bright eyes as I positioned the first book against my legs and opened the cover. He yawned and closed his eyes.

“Whatever your name is, you sure have funny taste in reading material.” I scratched his belly as I read, listening to him purr until he fell asleep.

This particular journal discussed the evolution of man, quoting Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution several times. The author, a Dr. Flückinger, seemed most interested in the ‘missing link” between man and ape. He argued that the Nephilim could very well be that missing piece. He believed that Nephilim did exist at one point, despite the complete lack of evidence. He stated that Nephilim skeletal remains could have already been found and mistaken for ape fossils, or miss-categorized for the lack of interest, time, and money.

From this, he listed several pieces of hominid fossils which scientists had casted cast aside with nonsense names simply because the findings were too incomplete to suggest anything important. Listed as examples were Homo rudolfensis, which was really just a single skull found in Kenya, and Homo ceprannensis, a skull cap found in Italy. Flückinger listed several more, citing that any of those could have been the fossils of Nephilim bones.

I skimmed through the rest and slowed down when I got to the second chapter. Here, Dr. Flückinger discussed what the Nephilim might have looked like and what their personality, dominate traits, diet, habets habits, and living conditions might have been like. He compared these aspects to those of typical Vampyres. None of it was far off from what Jesu told me. What I wanted to know was how the author knew Vampyres even existed and how the very idea of Nephilim started.

In the third chapter, Flückinger went on to discuss genetics, attempting to explain his theory on mitochondrial DNA and something he called Mitochondrial Eve, which was suppose to be the common mother of all creatures under the Homo genus. Form From this one female, both humans and Nephilim sprang.

Add this to ‘Y chromosome Adam’ and one could theoretically trace back to the start of the evolution of man as well as Nephilim. While Eve gave evolution a diverse gene pool to work with, Adam’s genes where homogeneous and had a higher extinction rate for Y chromosomes. Meaning that a small number of successful men could produce many children, while a large number of unsuccessful men would produce fewer children.

This lead to Flückinger’s conclusion that the first ever Vampyre must have been the offspring of one human female and one Nephilim male.

Signing Sighing, I put the book down and stretched my arms over my head, being careful not to wake the cat. As fascinating as the idea was, my body grew restless and craved motion. I was also thirsty. I stood, pausing to stretch out my legs, and then made my way to the kitchen Jesu and I shared. I opened the mini fridge sitting on the counter. Just as I suspected, medical bags of blood packed the inside.

The urge to hunt ignited from deep inside me as my mouth watered from the scarlet sight. Part of me, the sane part, was disgusted by the idea of drinking blood again. Another part said not to fight the urge. Closing the refrigerator, I forced myself to listen to the sane part of my brain.

Opening the cabinets, I found the glasses, turned on the kitchen faucet, and waited for the water to get cold. After shutting off the tap, I gulped down the water liquid(To keep from repeating?). It instantly coated my tongue with an ashy taste. Sputtering, I poured the rest of it into the sink and wiped my tongue wit the back of my sleeve to get the bitter taste out. It left my throat more dry and irrated irritated . The craving for blood intensified and a panicky rage began to prickle under my skin like small doses of static shock. I needed blood and I need needed it now!

With shaky hands, I opened the mini fridge and grabbed two bags of the slushy (Makes me think it’s frozen. Blood isn’t normally slushy.) liquid. Viciously grinding my teeth together to keep from savagely tearing into the bags, I reached for another glass. I was determined to drink the stuff like a civilized being.

As my body trembled, I poured the contents of one bag into the cup. I struggled to refrain from licking the counter when I spilled a drop over the edge of the glass. My breath came in labored shallow groans by the time I had steadied my hands enough to bring the cup to my lips instead of lapping it up like an animal.

Chugging the entire glass down, my body instantly relaxed, feeling renewed and reenergized. While pouring the second bag, the ecstatic high I felt the first time I drank blood kicked in, taking control of my mind. Primal desires took control of my body. The urge to hunt became unbearable, but it felt different this time. I no longer wanted to hunt to feed. I had all the blood I wanted right next to me. No, I craved something else. A toy. The thrill of the chaise. A tease. Like a cat playing with a mouse only to release it on its death bed. I was the bored cat wanting a mouse to tease.

That’s when I noticed Jesu’s emerald eyes watching me from just behind the corner. Someday I would have to learn how to move as silently as he did. For now, the way he stared reminded me of a mouse poking its little nose outside its hole, testing the air for danger. I wouldn’t be a danger to him, just a little fun.

My lips curled up as I stepped in his direction, instinctively bringing the glass of blood with me. I sipped it as I slowly circled him. My body tingled all over as I locked eyes with him. But I was the one hunting. Jesu was merely observing, interested in how I would react to the blood this time.

The little remaining sanity I had left fought for control, but the animalistic urges were stronger and crushed any attempt at logic. I slithered up to Jesu’s right side, his left braced against the wall. My heart raced as the scent of his essence drove my inner passions to the edge. I stood so close to him, my left hand brushed against his fingers. Just the thought of our fingers mingling together electrified my entire body. My heart raced as I traced the top of his palm with my index finger and thumb. My being screamed out for him, all the while never taking my eyes off his. I had to have him. He would be mine.

Jesu hesitated. A look of desire flashed across his face. I was so close to him! So close and yet my skin couldn’t feel him, couldn’t really feel the flesh on his hand, couldn’t feel the heat radiating from his body, couldn’t feel the sweet breath from his lips as it caught in this throat. Damn my numb skin! Why couldn’t I feel anything?

In my anger, I reached up and brushed his jet black hair back behind a pale blue pointed ear, and let my fingers tangle in the wispy layers while running my thumb gently along his high cheek bone. Nothing. Would I feel it if I pressed myself against him? Could he feel me? What if I kissed him, would either of us feel it? I wanted to kiss him. I demanded to know.

I could hear his heart racing in tempo with mine as I pressed my chest against his. His breath came in short, quick gasps. I lifted onto my toes, my lips less than an inch from his. I tilted my head. His lips parted. I leaned in, eager for the kill. Then he turned away.

“I think you’ve had enough blood.” He pushed me a step back with one arm while reaching for my drink with the other.

Instinctively bearing my teeth, an unnatural growl emanated from deep in my throat. “Mine!” I held the glass out of his reach.

“Fine.” Jesu withdrew his hand and stepped back until he was in front of his bedroom door. “But leave me out of your blood lust.”

Jesu knew I would react to the blood this way, knew I had crossed even my own boundaries as a side effect caused by the high. His reaction sobered me. He could have taken advantage of the moment. Did the blood have this effect on everyone? I wanted to ask Jesu, but he had already gone into his room , closing the door behind him.

Going back to the kitchen, I poured the rest of the blood down the drain even though the insane part of my brain screamed at me to stop. I had to learn to control the emotions and urges brought on by this blood lust. Sighing, I went to my room and blanketed myself in lonely silence. The cat wasn’t there. I looked under the bed and around for it, but there was no sign of him. Whatever.

I wondered what Anthony was doing right now, on the other side of the world. Did he know I was missing? Was he worried and looking for me? Or was he preoccupied with his mistress?

The thought instantly and violently filled me with rage. Grabbing the nearest item, Dr. Flückinger’s journal, I hurled it against the opposite wall. I watched in complete disappointment as it fluttered to the floor, not quite the dramatic effect I was going for.

Mustering all the rage, anger, and self pity I could manage, I smashed my fist as hard as I could into the stone wall. A dull ache followed the sound of crunching bones. I yelped and tried to yank my hand back, but I couldn’t pull my fist out. It was stuck in the wall!

“Ouch. OUCH! HEY! OWE Ow!” Damn soundproof room. Black stone engulfed my fist up to my wrist. Oh God, what do I do now? No one could hear me shout for help in here. Having a soundproof room was such a stupid idea. What was I thinking? The dull ache throbbing in my broken joints made it’s way up my forearm. What a perfect time for my ability to feel to come back!

The only thing I could do was try to yank it free. It could be hours before anyone decided to check on me again and, if I healed as fast as Jesu did, my bones might set crooked.

I took a deep breath. Okay. I can do this. I’ve been through worse, after all. I sucked in another deep breath, squeezed my eyes shut, and yanked with all my might.

“Ahhhhhhhh!” Fire shot up my arm as all the bones in my hand cracked apart again. I doubled over and pressed my face into the bed while screaming out muffled profanities. Funny how that seemed to hurt worse than Jalmari kicking me in the ribs. My had hand didn’t budge from the wall. Think! I scolded myself. I must be the most pathetic vampire ever. Okay, alright, it’s not so bad…I pep talked myself so I could think calmly. My hand didn’t hurt as long as I didn’t move it. Maybe if I relax my muscles it will slide out on its own?

I tried my best to relax, a difficult task when you have an appendage stuck to stone. Forcing myself to oblige, I found a somewhat comfortable position sitting with my legs crossed on my bed. I closed my eyes and tried deep, even breathing the way people did when they practiced Yoga. I even said “Ommm.”

After a couple minutes, my body really did begin to relax. My shoulders softened and my mind calmed down. Like a veil softly covering me, peace washed over my entire body and took all the fear and stress away, leaving me in a dark void. A tingling sensation started in my toes and worked its way up my calves and stomach, filling me with a buzzing energy. The energy made me weightless, like I could blow away in a breeze.

I began to feel cold and the dull ache in my hand faded away, only to be replaced by tingly chills. What is going on? I tried to open my eyes, but found that my body no longer obeyed my brain. Or they were open, but I was blind. Nausea knotted my stomach as I started to panic. I couldn’t see anything. I reached out with my other senses, but there was no smell, no sound, nothing.

Instead, the buzzing energy gave me the ability to feel like never before. I could feel … what? Air. That’s the name my brain gave to the chill wrapping around me, setting in my bones. It felt like a cloud or mist surrounding me. In addition, thin little waves rippled through me, slow and even. My brain named the ripples: motion. But what was moving? Not me. I was blind, deaf, and too terrified to try moving, but no longer numb. What a trade-off.

Whatever this was, I didn’t like it. Even though my sense of touch felt freer than ever, I’d trade it back in a heartbeat for my other senses. If I could only figure out how.

I was trying to relax when I entered this coma-like zone, so logic would dictate that I un-relax to get out of it. Concentrating, I tried to tense up. I clenched my eyes tight, assuming they open before. It was hard to tell. I tensed my arms, legs, hands, and feet, then tightly clenched my stomach and back muscles.

Before I knew it, I landed on my butt, on the bed where I started, the springs bouncing a bit. I saw clear as day in the moonlit room, and I smelled the strong stench of decaying earth, moldy stone walls, and dry wood. My hand was no longer lodged in the wall and didn’t even hurt as my skin had returned to its dull dumbness. I would have thought the whole thing never happened except for the evidence. One, I was completely naked. My clothes laid in a pile underneath my bottom. Two, there was a hole in the stone wall the size of my fist and, three, all the finger on my right hand were bent at odd angles. My pinky dangled lifeless from the knuckle. Not good.

Leaping from my bed and flinging the door open, I ran into Jesu’s room, (Naked!?) not bothering to knock first. He was painting swishing blobs of brown on a small canvas. I couldn’t help but notice the one covered by the dirty sheet, that I saw this morning, that leaned against the wall behind the easel.

Jesu eyed me,(Wouldn’t he do a little more than eye her since she’s naked?) his brows furrowed as though my interruption annoyed him. “Yes?”

Where to start? Without a word, I stuck my broken hand up. Jesu cocked an eyebrow. He cleared a small corner on his desk and put down his palate of earth tones and paintbrush. Pushing his hair back out of his face, his hand smeared a smidge of brown across his azure cheek bone.

“What happened?” He closed the gap between us and tenderly took my hand into his palms.

“I punched a hole in the wall and my fist got stuck.” That sounded crazy even as I said it. For a moment I worried Jesu wouldn’t believe me.

Instead he snickered and shook his head. “You didn’t.”

Sheepishly, I fixed my eyes on my feet and nodded.

Jesu barked out a laugh. “Jenna, when I said you could punch holes in the walls, I did not mean it literally.”

My face burned and my eyebrows furrowed. Of course I knew that! But I grit gritted my teeth together to keep from snapping at him. My hand needed help first.

Jesu gently turned my hand this way and that, studying it. “Does it hurt?”

I shook my head.

“It has probably healed already. Maria will have to re-break the bones to set them straight.”

I winced. “Isn’t there some other way?”

“No,” Jesu chuckled. “You will hardly feel it and you will be good as new in an hour or so.”

“I sure felt it break the first time.”

“That is because you broke all your fingers at once. One at a time will feel like five little pinches.” He motioned for me to follow. The two of us headed down the hall to the corridor leading to the first wing.

“Do you break your bones much?” I asked as we entered the pitch black portion of the hallway.

Jesu took my good hand into his, leading the way so I wouldn’t hurt myself further. “Only once. I was twelve and I broke my leg.”

“How?”

“Jalmari dared me to climb a tree and jump off. I had a small fear of heights then and did not want to, but he teased me, so I did.” Jesu snorted. “We were just stupid boys back then.”

“It must be nice to heal so fast when you’re a kid. You can brake your leg one day and go back to running and jumping the next day.” We emerged from the darkness into the butchery-like kitchen. Jesu let go of my hand.

“I could not heal rapidly when I was a kid. I was born human and, well, Jalmari did not know. He thought I was like him.”

“Jalmari was born a vampire … I mean a Vampyre … and you where born a human?”

Jesu nodded while taking a seat on a steel stool behind the wood and metal island in the center of the kitchen. I sat next to him and tried not to drool at the aroma of death blanketing everything in the room.

“Are you guys half-brothers?”

Jesu shook his head. “Cover your ears.”

I did. Jesu shouted Maria’s name. Unclasping my hands from my ears, I could hear Maria’s muffled groan. Seconds later, she magically appeared near the refrigerator.

She smiled bright at us. “Yes?”

“There’s been an accident.” Jesu pointed at my broken hand as I held it out for her to see.

“Oh, my. Lay it on the counter, darling, let me have a good look.” She floated through the table like a ghost, becoming solid again on the other side, directly across from me.

As I laid my bad hand on the counter for her, I asked, “How do you do that?”

“What, this?” She passed her left hand through mine, her fingers and palm becoming nothing more than a black shadow as she did so. I was disappointed then that I couldn’t feel her passing through my skin and bones. I expected to fell feel a tingly sensation or something.

“Yes! Can I do that?”

“Perhaps.” She laid my hand on the counter palm down against the wood surface.

“Perhaps?” I urged.

“Your powers depend on what clan your sire is from.” She grasped my thumb and squeezed it until the bone cracked.

“Ouch!” The sting was a bit more than the small pinch Jesu promised.

“My apologies.” She pressed down on my index finger like she was performing CPR on my digit. I heard the crunch but only felt a dull ache that time.

“What’s a sire?” I cringed as she snapped my middle finger.

Jesu answered for her. “The Vampyre or vampire who bit you is termed a ‘sire’.”

“Oh. Owe Ow!” I jumped.

“Try to be still, darling, I don’t think you want me to have to start over.”

I gnashed my teeth together. Last finger, Itold myself as Maria crunched my pinky into place. “How come I can feel pain, but nothing else?”

Maria gave Jesu a meaningful glance before turning her attention back to my hand. “Here is not the place to discuss such matters.”

I nodded. Right. Jalmari could hear us. Yet I had so many questions and not having the answers was beyond frustrating. Maria placed both her palms on my hand, one on top of the other. She pushed down with all her weight until my hand cracked and snapped.

“OUCH! Geese Geeze…” A low growl sounded in my throat as my temper flared.

“Alright, all done. No need to get feisty. You must keep your hand perfectly still and flat for a half hour. No getting up from that spot, do you hear?”

I nuzzled my hand, wanting to lick it. “What if I have to go to the bathroom?”

“You’ll just have to wait, darling,” she smiled.

Grumbling, I rested my chin on the counter and looked over my ghost while hand. (Something‘s wrong here. Not sure what you‘re trying to say.) “What did you mean when you said my powers depend on my sire?” No one answered me.

The sound of the fridge door opening and blood sloshing from side to side awakened my carnal hunting instincts, nearly causing me to jump out of my seat. Jesu placed a hand on my shoulder to steady me.

“Patients,” he whispered. “You will get some.”

I glared at him for a moment but remembered my hand. Whimpering, I obeyed and dropped my chin against the counter. Moments later, Maria placed a tall glass of blood in front of me. My head shooting up, I gripped the glass with my good hand, intent on chugging down the salty liquid.

Jesu placed a hand on the glass, tipping it down and forcing me to sip it. I growled a warning at him. I will bite him if he doesn’t let go! (italics?)

“You need to learn self control.” His eyes narrowed.

“Get your hand off my drink before I give Maria a reason to re-break your fingers!”

He hesitated before letting go. I gulped down the rest of my drink, licking my lips several times, and then tried to lick the glass clean. My tongue couldn’t reach far enough so I set the glass upside-down on the counter and waited for the last drops to trickle down.

Jesu and Maria sipped at their drinks in silence.

“I have one last question, and then I’ll shut up for a while,” I bargained. “What’s the cat’s name?”

Jesu instantly chocked choked on his drink. Slamming the glass down, he sputtered and coughed up blood.

I gawked at him. “Are you okay?”

Maira Maria eyed Jesu, cocking her eyebrows questioningly. “The cat? Why, the cat is …”

“NO …” Jesu coughed, trying to suck in air and clear his throat at the same time. “We … do not … have … a …” he gagged on the last word.

Maria’s polite smile stretched into a sly grin, reaching from ear to ear as she watched Jesu. She turned and looked directly into my eyes. “The cat is a stray. He doesn’t have a name.” Stealing a glance at Jesu, she added, “YOU should name him.”

“Me?”

“Absolutely! You two would make great company for each other. Beside,” she waived waved her hand dismissively, “the rest of us are not very fond of the creatures.”

I thought about this. Having a pet made my stay here seem more permanent. However, I already promised the cat I’d bring it back to Chicago with me. I looked at Jesu. “What do you think?”

His face turned bright blue. At first I thought he was seriously choking, but the death stare he gave Maria from behind his ebony hair made me realize he was blushing.

Jesu spoke to Maria in hushed Finnish. Both of them stole little glances at me when they thought I wasn’t looking.

I shrugged, lifted my glass, and turned it right-side up. A circle of red gathered on the wood and I licked it off the counter. Jesu started looking good as the blood took its effect on my brain. Maria wasn’t bad herself. They must have been able to tell I was falling under the blood lust’s spell because they both excused themselves and walked toward the fourth wing, disappearing into the corridor.

Left alone to wait as my hand healed, I made a mental note of all the things I had learned and all the things I still had questions about. The latter far outweighed the former, filling me with rage. With the blood still fresh in my system, I wanted so badly to beat the answers out of them.

Maria returned first, startling me when she appeared out of thin air. “How’s your hand doing?”

I shrugged. “Hard to tell when you can’t feel a thing.”

“Can you wiggle your fingers? Easy now, one at a time. Does it hurt?” She watched as I moved my fingers up and down, one at a time. A dull ache stiffened my knuckles.

“It’s a little uncomfortable, but not painful.”

Maria nodded. “Alright, you can go if you’d like, but try to keep it still, don’t use it for anything today.”

“Okay.” I stood, being careful not to push off with my right hand and not to wiggle my fingers as I let my arm drop to my side. Jesu appeared just in front of the corridor, waiting for me with his arms crossed. He walked me back to the fourth wing in silence. I could feel the effects of the drink wearing off as the two of us stood in the hall between my room and his. I grabbed Jesu’s wrist before he shut himself in his room again.

He turned his head only and peered down at me.

I had to take a deep breath to calm the little bit of blood lust left in my system as I gazed into his eyes.

“Jesu, I need answers.”

“Read the journals.”

“How did you know about that?”

He shrugged and stepped into his room.

“Wait.” I wrapped my hand tighter around his arm. “There was something else that happened to me while my hand was stuck in the wall. I … I think I was temporarily blind and …” Letting go of his wrist, I searched for the words to explain what I felt before. “I felt like I was floating.”

Jesu’s eyes darted around the room for a minute as though trying to decide something. “Can you show me? Can you do it again?”

“I … don’t even know what it was.”

“What were you doing just before you went blind?” He faced me. We stood less than a foot away from each other as he watched me intensely. I tried to think but shrugged.

“Nothing. I was just sitting on the bed with my hand stuck in the wall, yelling for help and trying to pull it out. When that didn’t work I tried relaxing to see if it would slide out. Next thing I know, I’m blind and deaf.”

“But you could feel everything around you, feel the air.”

“Yes,” I nodded. “What does it mean?”

“Do it again. Relax until you go blind.” He narrowed his eyes as if daring me.

Butterflies flitted around my stomach. I looked away from his hard staring. “I’d rather not. It wasn’t exactly a pleasant feeling.”

Gentle Gently, Jesu rested a hand on my cheek and pulled my face up until he could stare deep into my eyes. “Do not worry, Jenna. I will bring you back. I promise.”

Oh the way he says my name! “It’s not just that, it’s … well …” I looked at my feet. “See, I somehow ended up naked last time.”(Technically she should still be naked. You never did mention her putting her clothes back on. )

“Oh,” Jesu blushed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, we can go into your room and I can hold a blanket up.” He avoided looking at me while saying this.

I hesitated. “You promise you won’t look?”

“Of course. Come.” Jesu motioned at my room and the two of us went in. I stood near the bed and felt a little sickened by the hole in the wall. Jesu snickered at it as he yanked the bed’s comforter off and held it up against me with his arms spread wide.

I winched winced a little as he watched me. “Do you really promise not to look?”

“Absolutely. I would not dream of it.” He said this a little too convincingly. I pursed my lips and wondered if he thought I was unattractive.

I closed my eyes and took several slow, deep breaths. I didn’t say ommm this time. It was too embarrassing. After a few moments, I opened them. Jesu stared back. I snapped. “Don’t stare like that, it makes me nerves!”

“Sorry.” He turned his head away.

I sat on the edge of the bed and tried again. Relax. Relax. I said ommm silently to myself. Peaceful. Weightless. Like a feather. My toes and finger tips tingled. Then my arms and legs, until my whole body tingled the way it does when a limb falls asleep. A slight chill ran up my bones. I felt myself buzz with energy.

Testing my vision, I tried to open one eye. I couldn’t, or did, but couldn’t see. Blackness had engulfed me. I tried to sniff the air, but my nose was clogged. I couldn’t breath. Oh my God, I can’t breath! Panic raced through me. I tried to scream, but I had no voice. I tried to scramble for helpsemicolon here? I couldn’t move. I’m going to suffocate! Or … I thought I was. I thought my lungs would burn and gasp for air, but nothing happened. I just … floated, surrounded by a black fog of serenity. I didn’t need to breath.

Something warm wafted through the air nearby. It came to me as nothing more than a quick ripple of heat pulsing through the air. I liked it because I could actually feel it. I could count each ripple as it rolled through my body. Thick and strong, the heat softened the chill that wrapped me. Sensual and yet somehow masculine, my brain named it for me: a hand. Jesu’s hand.

Whoa.

My body grew heavy again in a matter of seconds. My muscles pulled themselves together, tensing tight. I dropped two inches, making the springs in the bed bounce as I landed on my bottom.

Whipping my head around, I realized I was back in my room. Jesu still held up the blanket but was facing me; his eyes the size of one dollar coins. His skin was paler than normal, even for a vampire. My clothes laid on a piled by my feet.

“Give me that!” I snatched the blanket and quickly wrapped around myself. “You promised you wouldn’t look!”

Jesu stared back. His lips moved but no sound came from them. Suddenly I didn’t think it was my awesome bod that stool stole his breath.

“Jesu?” I shook his shoulder. He blinked then stood and paced around the room. I watched as he pulled a box if cigarettes and a lighter from his back pocket. “Jesu, what happened?”

He looked at me then turned away, pacing again as he lit a cigarette.

“Damn it, Jesu, I’m getting extremely inpatient with this entire family,” I stood.

He faced me and placed both hands on my shoulders. His blue color returned, but his eyes(?) didn’t look any more at ease than before.

“Remember what you asked Mari Maria just a little while ago? About your powers?”

“Uh, yeah.” I stared back. He was scaring me now.

“You can do it.”

“I can do what?”

“Jenna, you can fly.”

“Huh?”

“And turn invisible.”

“Come again?”

Jesu laughed, completely hysterical now. “Jenna, you can turn invisible and fly!”