Under Construction - MHWA Retreat

Thanks Char! I'm happy to be here. I will try to make time for completing the tasks. I can see it is a great way to stay involved!

I always struggle to describe my work because it's so uncommon and really governmental I work for a local government unit called a Soil and Water Conservation District that protects natural resources (including soil, groundwater, lakes, rivers, forests, etc) by installing projects to protect those resources and educating the public about those resources. I'm a science geek at heart and many of my colleagues are geologists, hydrologists, engineers, etc, but I work at the interface between humans and the environment bringing our conservation message to the public through outreach and education. My title is "Outreach and Engagement Coordinator." That's the background. Where the stress comes in is that I literally created my position where nothing like it existed before. I was able to get city governments to invest $125,000 to fund me and my activities for two years, during which time I need to prove my worth and prove I'm valuable and my work is valuable. Getting money from government for anything education related is a HUGE deal, so I have a lot riding on my doing a good job not only for the sake of my continued employment, but also for the sake of natural resource education in the future. Yesterday, I facilitated a meeting with 17 city stakeholders in my area to field their questions about the work plan of activities I had drafted. I really really love what I do and know it fills a huge need in my community, but when I think too hard about it, it really freaks me out how much I have riding on my shoulders. It's a lot of pressure Anyway, if you want to know more specifics, I'd be happy to share

That's a good rephrasing you mentioned: saying "This will be challenging." Yes, I will need to practice that.

Re: Baggage - erm, yeh. I feel like my emotions about those years of my life are suddenly bubbling up from where I trapped them back then. I've been more open with myself about the harm I did to my psyche, which has let my mind relax about those memories and (oddly) I've been remembering more and more things that happened during that time that somehow slipped out of my conscious memory. I don't know if that's normal, but it's happening, and I think I'm fine with it because it makes for fun writing fodder. One example that's been posted is here: "Mistakes" 

Thanks again for the welcome! I look forward to being involved around here!
-Em