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 |  A support forum for writers dealing with mental illness |
 Ah huh... what a friggen question. So, I have Borderline Personality and Generalized Anxiety Disorder... and I often wonder... is it because of BPD/GAD or is this just like who I am now.... I change... drastically. In reality it wasn't THAT long ago that I was a complete nutcase who did enough drugs in a day to kill 3 horses, I hitchhiked across the country, I slept around, had complete mood swings all the time, would disappear from life for weeks at a time doing off the wall shit just because it was exciting..I'd be on my phone 24/7 and always with friends and needed to be around other people... then for a while I changed and became an alcholic and became a gym freak who went to the gym daily, dieted all the time, was a health crazed person who was really into hollistic approaches and spent all my money doing shit like taking $90 yoga classes so I could have a private instructor.... then I changed again and again and again... currently, I sit home 24/7 and don't go anywhere, don't do anything - I'm a stay at home mom, I don't even work, I don't really have friends or look at my phone ever, I don't even like talking to people I just want to be alone, I read and write and hang out with my baby..I don't want to work out I'm lazy as hell... I don't want any adventure or excitement or anything I want to be left alone in my bubble in my room. I get MAD when my fiance expects me to go ANYWHERE even his sisters house for 2 hours. I DON'T WANT TO GO. I don't want to have sex, I don't want to do anything just leave me alone to read and write and chill with the baby while I read and I write. lolNow, is that because that's just ME or because I'm Borderline. See what I'm saying? ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
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