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 |  A support forum for writers dealing with mental illness |
I'm finally taking the time to get involved here and let me say, this is something I should have gotten involved in long before now. Anyway, my reply is to SPACE COBWEBS  and indirectly to Charlie ~  as well. I can also do, well, I used to be able to do the same thing (shutting off emotion) and it wasn't self-control for me either although it sounds like that, at least not intentional self-control. I consider it more of a defense mechanism. It was for the same reason mentioned above. I wouldn't give the person I was dealing with the satisfaction of knowing they hurt me. It was a complete shutdown and my expression did not change no matter what they did or said to me. It can be very distressing for someone who is trying to get a reaction. Looking back, it's not a good feeling or a healthy position to be in. I am glad I am in a safe relationship and place in my life where I can show emotion without feeling vulnerable like that.   |
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