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Sarah picked you up off the doorstep and as she did so she seemed to get a strange sensation.
"James? Is that you? Are you my Sunday paper?"
You balked. How could she possibly know you were her newspaper? you tried to reply, but you couldn't.
"Oh I'm going to have so much fun with this," Sara giggled. She slapped you down hard on the table. Despite not being able to speak, you retained all of your senses and her slapping you onto the table hurt. Sara left you there for a moment while she went to get herself a cup of coffee. She then sat down to read you. As she flicked the pages over you found this tickled and it was somewhat arousing. Sara seemed to sense it.
"Calm down," she murmured. "You probably can't cum anyway. Newspapers are inanimate objects. Inanimate objects don't get to cum." As Sara finished reading you she got out a pair of scissors and started to cut into you to cut out any coupons she wanted. Her cutting hurt you but there was nothing you could do and she didn't seem to care. Finally, finished with you, she tossed you aside.
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