“Well you ain’t you just the cutest thing to ever grace this side o’ the jungle?”
You froze in place, looking up at the huge, hulking reptile just a few feet in front of you. The beast was about 12 feet tall, her head almost poking over the trees. Her scaly body looked completely smooth, like a shark’s, and most of her body was pastel brown, with her underbelly being a slightly lighter hue. Her form was thick and curvaceous from all her previous meals, with most of the weight going to her big, round potbelly, which swung to and fro beneath her as she walked. Her eyes were huge and glowed like gold, and were surprising beautiful for such a creature, with pure black scales above them that strangely resembled feminine eyelashes. The most notable quality of the creature, though, was her booming, human-like voice, which echoed through the jungle every time she spoke.
After a few moments of silence, you screamed so loudly that birds were startled in the distance. You couldn’t help it; you were staring face to face with a t-rex. After watching jurassic park, you could only see creatures like her as mindless killing machines; the perfect predators, capable of tearing a man in half with a single bite. However, the t-rex before you only seemed startled by your terror, blushing in embarrassment. “Whoa! No need to be scared. I ain’t hostile or nothin',” she said. In an attempt to calm you, she lied down on her belly, so that the two of you were about eye-level; a classic show of non-hostility among animals. Now that she wasn’t towering over you anymore, you actually managed to calm down somewhat, catching your breath. “See? Not a threat. Sorry if I scared ya.”
“Y-you can… talk?” You gasped inbetween breaths, slowly backing away from the reptile. You were calming down somewhat, but you still didn’t like being too close to that maw of hers, nor did you like the smell of her meaty breath blowing against your face every time she exhaled.
“Well, that’s an odd question, sugar. Better question is, who can’t talk?” She giggles, still lying there, laying her head against the floor of the jungle. “I mean, you’re flappin’ your gums right now, so it can’t be too hard…”
Soon, you’ve returned to your senses. If the t-rex could talk, that must mean she has human-level intellect and social ability. If that was the case, there was no reason to believe she was just a mindless predator. She seemed downright civil at the moment, in fact. Of course, you were still panicked by how impossible this situation was — dinosaurs were supposed to be extinct, after all, and they definitely weren’t supposed to talk — but you figure those sorts of questions could wait until later. For now, you just focused on ensuring this reptile lady won’t get angry and decide to devour you alive. “W-well… I guess I don’t really know much, but I never thought a tyrannosaurus rex would-”
“A tyranno-what?” She interrupted, raising a brow incredulously.
You shuddered, worried that you’d offended her somehow… but it seemed she was just curious. With a nervous cough, you replied. “I-it’s the term for… y-your species.”
“Huh. That’s a ten-dollar word if I ever heard one. I ain’t never been called a whatchamacallit rex before,” she noted, rubbing her chin with a claw contemplatively.
“What are you called, then?” You asked.
“Well, you can call me Ivy. Pleased to make your acquaintance,” she smiled — a smile which, you shuddered to notice, inadvertently showed off her huge teeth. Now that you were slightly more comfortable around her, she lifted her head, then she remained lying down. “Now, it’s only fair you tell me; what do they call you?”
“M-me?” You responded nervously. “I’m just… a human. My name is Scott. Virgil Scott.”
“Hmm… you really must not be from around here, huh? I’ve never seen anythin’ like ya,” she said, looking down on you curiously, as if sizing you up.
“Yeah, you don’t know the half of it…” You sigh. “I’ve never really seen anything like you, either, though I knew a bit about your species.”
“Oh, really, now?” She smiled, amused by your seeming wealth of knowledge. “Care to tell me some of it? Maybe I can fill in some gaps in your knowledge.”
“Well, I… know you’re a carnivore,” you say nervously, just to see how she responds.
“Hah! Well, that much is obvious!” She said, and you got a chilling view of her maw as she let out a big, hearty laugh. You shuddered when you remembered the rumors that t-rexes were capable of swallowing a man whole. “Tell me something I don’t know!”
“Well, to be honest, I guess I didn’t know as much as I thought,” you said, hoping she’d have mercy on you if you could make her laugh. “For example, us humans thought… thought a t-rex would have feathers,”
“Pfft hahaha! Feathers? Do I look like a bird to you?” She let out an even bigger laugh than the first time, and it took her a while to cool down. She seemed more amused than ever, her huge tail wagging behind her as she prodded you for questions. “Guess ya don’t know as much as I thought... but you seem like the curious sort. Why don’t you ask me some questions?”
There was only one question on your mind, but you weren’t courageous enough to actually ask it before now. You didn’t even want to ask it now, but you figured you needed to know the answer. You sighed, clenching your eyes shut, slowly gathering your courage. “Uh… are you…” You slowly manage to choke out. “... p-planning on… e-eating me?”
A saddened frown emerged on the reptile’s face. You gasped in surprise as she leaned down, nuzzling your body with her snout, only to realize she was trying to console you. Her snout was… actually surprisingly soft and pillowy. Perhaps that was the result of all her extra weight? “Oh, sugar, no. You’re probably the coolest, cutest critter I’ve seen ‘round these parts. I wouldn’t hurt a hair on your body,” she reassures you. “Besides, us big gals usually go for more filling meals. No offense, ‘Scott’, but, uh… you don’t look like you’ve got much meat on your bones. Hehe!”
“Ha… ha…” You nervously fake a laugh as she pulled away, looking down on you once again.
“So… what’re ya travelling through the jungle for?” She asks. “Since you’re out here all on your lonesome, I figure you’re not planning on settlin’ down.”
“Actually, I’m… sort of lost,” you admit sheepishly. “I really don’t have a place to stay.”
“Oh, dear. You know there are raptor packs living all throughout these parts, right? If you don’t know where you’re going, you might waltz right into one of ‘em,” she frowns. “A grisly fate, that is. I wouldn’t want you getting hurt. Hmmm…” She stares at the ground, furrowing her brow as if pondering something. Eventually, she comes to a conclusion. “Tell ya what. I’ve been pretty lonely lately. Why don’t you stick with me? I can keep you super safe.” She smiles. “After all, nobody is going to want to mess with a… t-rex, was it? T-rex… I actually quite like that name. It’s fitting...”
“Wait, s-so… what are you saying?” You ask. “You want me to be your travelling companion?”
“I’m just offerin’ to protect ya, sugar. Let ya ride around on my back, teach ya how to survive out here, the works,” she offers, “but if you don’t trust me, that’s okay. It’s your choice. I ain’t gonna force ya.”
“Is there a… catch?” You ask, tentatively.
“Well, y’know, I might ask you to do a few favors every once in awhile,” she grins. “My arms are pretty tiny, as you can see, so I might need ya to help me bathe, or collect food, or even give me a nice bellyrub every once in awhile. Y’know, the usual.” She shrugs. “But… really, I just want to have somebody to talk to. And you seem like a fun lil’ fella, so… I’d like to hang out more. What do ya say?”
Well, that didn't sound so bad. You silently stare at the ground, considering it. On one hand, you wanted to get away from the t-rex asap. The more time you spent around her, the more likely it is she’ll get hungry and decide you look like an easy snack. Then again, you weren’t sure you’d fare much better out here on your own, either. If what she’s saying was true, and the t-rex really would protect and shelter you… that might be the best chance you were ever going to have of surviving out here.