Turning around, your blind sided by two giant cheeks. Before you can figure out what’s what, your pinned to the ground, helpless, beneath the biggest ass you have ever seen.
“Assman! What are you going her?” You cry out. “How long have you been here!?”
“Oh” he replies, “long enough to hear your plans. So you think your going to defame me? Think I’m a stupid hero?”
“No listen that’s not what I meant…” you hope you can backpedal.
“No you listen. Normal I like to, you know, focus on villains who are worth my time. But tonight, since its such a slow night” You can hear his stomach turn. Oh god.. “I can spend the whole night sitting here. Taking a little break.” Ass man pulls out a news paper and turns to the sports page. “Unfortunately for you, being such a slow night, I haven’t farted all night. So I gotta blow it all right here.”
Assman wiggles, creeping his cheeks. Trapped beneath his massive butt, your head is lined up, directly in his Blast zone.
“Assman please.. I didn’t mean it..”
“Tell you what. Since I’m a nice guy. Ill let you off the hook. If you can tell me just why I shouldn’t fart soo much that you’ll be smelling like my ass for years. Say how much you love me. Say you’ll be one of my fans. Tell me that I’m the greatest superhero around. Better hurry though..” His ass wines, “ooo.. last nights chilli is dying to come out..”
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