I don’t know why I chose to stay in with those wretched children. They probably wouldn’t have been any trouble if I’d taken them out but I had banked on using the evening to get my essay written so they’d just have to put up with it.
The first argument was about food. The kids wanted pizzas but I had been told to give them the salad that had been left in the ice box.
In the end I got sick of yelling and I told them to go play by themselves. Pizzas! I’d give them pizzas all right. I got out my books to get my essay written. I didn’t know they were the sort of mischief they would get up to if they were left to their own devices.
It was half an hour before the shouting got so loud that I had to take notice.
“What’s going on with you kids?” I yelled, “can’t we have bit piece and quiet round here.”
“She’s cheating,” said Ernie.
“No I’m not!” said Beth
“Stupid game,” said Billy.
“What game are you playing?” I asked, not at all interested really. I had to get back to my essay.
“They’re playing strip poker,” said Billy, “stupid game.”
“What!” I said, “you can’t play that!”
“Why not,” said Beth, “you said we could play whatever we liked.”
“Yes but…” I didn’t want to get into a long discussion, “play whatever you like. I need to work.”
But it was only ten minutes before the screaming started again.
“Will you kids keep quiet!”
“You come and play with us. Then we’ll keep quiet,” said Beth.
“I can’t play strip poker with you!”
“Why ever not?”
“Well… well… because…” I couldn’t think on anything else to say.
“It’s nothing to worry about,” said Beth in her serious manner. ”We all draw a card. The highest card chooses one of the other players to give them a piece of clothing. We all end up wearing each others clothes. It’s fun. Play it with us for a bit, and then we’ll be quiet.”
“Well what if you keep losing?” That was fatal. I should have just said no.
“When somebody gets down to their undies the game stops and we play something else,” said Beth reassuringly.
“Oh I don’t know…”
“Donna’s a spoil-sport. Donna’s a spoil-sport,” chanted Billy.
That did it. I wasn’t going to be called a spoil-sport by anyone.
It was only when the game started that I realised how the rules of the game worked. When I won I got a piece of clothing all right. But when any of the others won they all took clothes from me. And as there were three of them they won three times as often. I’d been tricked. I should have stopped when I realised what they were doing but I didn’t want to be called a spoil sport again.
In twenty minutes I was standing there in my bra and panties. Respectable bra and panties, but bra and panties nonetheless; they were bright red and the panties had ‘Hello Kitty’ emblazoned across them.
Suddenly I came to my senses. I was supposed to be babysitting these kids and I’d let them see me in my undies. My face went as red as my panties.
“Okay kids,” I said, trying to be as authoritative as I could semi-naked, “games over. Can I have my clothes back please?”
Beth looked at me quizzically.
“Oh didn’t we say,” she said, “you have to do a forfeit to get them back.”
“What forfeit!
“Go down to Pizza Hut and buy us all pizzas!” they chorused in unison.
“Well give me my clothes back and I’ll go,” I said in exasperation.
“Oh no,” said Ernie, “pizzas first, clothes second.”
“What! I can’t go down to Pizza Hut dressed like this.”
“If you want your clothes back you will,” said Beth.
Oh my God! What was I to do?