"H-Hey come on Lil Lizz there isn't any need for violence" Mike gulped as he stared down the two barrels of the dwarven shotgun leveled at his face.
Though most gnomes were highly regarded for their forays into the often dangerous and reality-bending realm of Engineering, Lizzy "Lil Lizz" Sprigsprocket had chosen a less sensible path. She was renowned as Ironforge's most bizarre alchemist, focusing her talents not on making healing droughts or skill-enhancing elixirs, but on potions with often questionable effects. Potions that turned your hair green, potions that enhanced your treasure finding abilities (But only on the third Saturday of every month), and potions that caused you to swell up like a balloon. Two-Bits was banking on the fact that Lil Lizz might have something to help "grease the wheels." of his current project.
"I told you once Two-Bits, if I caught you setting foot in my shop after the last time, I'd paint the walls with your head." Lil Lizz yelled in a high pitched voice.
"Now hold on, can I really be blamed if your love potion, which was extremely effective and at a more than accommodating price I might add, would stir up such feelings for you?"
"And exactly what part of that potion was responsible for you stealing and fencing my alembic and my inventory of herbs after you wore me out in bed?" Lil Lizz cocked the hammer of her shotgun as she began to squeeze the trigger.
"Wait hold on, what if I told you I have a tidy sum of gold for your services!" Mike yelped in a last ditch effort to save his skin.
"Alright, that's a start." Lizz said as she lowered the gun. "Start talking pretty boy."
"Well I'm glad we can at least be sensible about this!" Two-Bits sighed in relief as he relaxed his posture. "You remember Slicer Slam, pretty young dwarf girl who I used to run with back in Stormwind?"
"Of course, I used to make designer poisons for her whenever she found some interesting herbs."
"Well I got me a little wager with her. This is her first Brewfest since she gave up the life of adventure and thieving, and she seems to think she's incapable of gaining on the dwarven diet. I aim to prove her wrong."
"So you're going to cheat like a horny goblin?"
"But of course! I just need something to unleash the proper dwarf in her, if you get my drift."
Lil Lizz thought for a second before it hit her. "I got what ya need right here Two-Bits." Lizz shuffled to the back of her store, throwing open a gigantic dresser filled with numerous vials, all bubbling in different bright flourscent colors. "This one right here should do it." The vial Lizz pulled out was a bright neon green, the concoction bubbled furiously in the contents of it's glass shell. The label simply read "Hog Fattener."
"Subtlety was never your strong suit was it Lizz?"
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