Howard stomped back into his dorm room. He’d spent over an hour at the post office in order to sign for some certified letter he wasn’t even expecting. He’d never had to sign for a letter before. He tore open the envelope to find out what wasted an hour of his day.
Dear Mr. Schwartz, We are pleased to inform you that you’ve been selected to compete on the new season of Big Man on Campus.
Howard’s heart skipped a beat. Big Man on Campus! His favorite (and only) reality show he watched!
A bunch of nerdy guys live together in a house, compete in games and get voted off one at a time (just like Big Brother). The only difference is The Machine. It can make whoever stepped out of it taller, with less fat and more muscle than when they went in. No one knows how it works and the show’s producers won’t say, but it’s definitely real.
As long as contestants stayed on the show, they got to keep growing bigger, until at the end only one huge muscle stud remained. And along with a new body, the winner also got a million dollar prize.
It only lasted a few weeks, but Howard watched every episode religiously. For as long as he could remember he’d wished he were taller and better built. And when he found about open auditions for the next season he practically fell over himself to send in a tape.
We feel you’re an ideal candidate for our show
He knew what that meant. 5’6” and 125 lbs. soaking wet, Howard was the prototypical skinny nerd the show catered to. They even asked him to wear his glasses on the show rather than contacts.
The guy who won started out short and scrawny like him, and by the end had grown into a 6’9” well muscled athlete who just the other day was named to the NBA All-Star team.
He signed the all the attached paperwork and started packing for his trip to LA.
…
Howard took his place on the darkened stage. Each contestant was led into their own little spotlight by a scantily-clad swimsuit model surrounded by half a dozen cameras. And they each had to stand there in nothing but boxer shorts.
Howard looked over to the other contestant who would soon be introduced and tried to size up the competition.
Dan stood 5’11”, but weighed an immense 375 pounds of fat. He could’ve just as easily been on The Biggest Loser instead. He looked the least happy about standing around in his skivvies.
Jason also looked rather meek and embarrassed, but to Howard he looked like trouble. Even though he was nothing but skin and bones, Jason was 6’5” tall. With that height he could divert more of his growth to his muscles and outshine all the others.
Hank was almost the same size as Dan, but looked like he might have some muscle mass underneath the fat.
All in all they were a varied group physically, but still a typical group of nerds.
The fifth contestant, however, didn’t fit the norm.
His name was Craig. He was 6’1” and at least 200 lbs. of lean muscle; the typical football jock. He was already as big as many of last year’s contestants were half-way though the competition. And unlike the others, he wasn’t the least bit self conscious about being on TV in his underwear; he tried to look inconspicuous about flexing his arms and 6-pack abs for the camera.
It looks like the producers wanted to add some extra antagonism for the new season. Even if he didn’t win, he was probably going to make things miserable while he was here.
“Gentlemen, welcome to the all new season of Big Man on Campus!”
A spotlight lit up in the center of the stage revealing Tom Manning, the show’s mostly tolerable host.
“This... is The Machine!”
Another light revealed the real star of the show. It looked like a death ray from an old Sci-Fi movie with lots of tubes and flashing lights. Howard assumed that was all for show, but he didn’t care as long as it worked.
“The Machine can give you the body you always wanted, but only for a price.”
Tom dramatically held up a large brass coin with a plus sign on it.
“This... is a growth token. Each token will grant you one of the following:
An inch in height
5 pounds of muscle gain
10 pounds of fat loss
And new for this season, growth tokens can also be used to grant you ½ inch of growth... down there.”
The models all tittered, as they’d obviously been prompted to do. Howard heard they were going to “spice things up” this season and add an uncensored online feed of what went on in the house at night, but he never imagined that was going to entail everyone’s dicks growing bigger.
You may notice a few other changes this year. The next Big Man on Campus could be... a woman!
Even more spotlights popped on and similarly under-clothed male models led out another group of five contestants- all girls!
Claire was positively tiny. 4’10” tall and likely not even 100 pounds. She seemed happy and excited to be here despite the circumstances.
Alyssa was also very slight of frame, but unlike Claire stood a fantastic 6’3”. Just like Jason, she could be trouble.
Rachel and Denise were actually sisters. They were both about the same 5’7” in height and both pretty heavy. They didn’t look too formidable, but if they worked together, could prove a challenge.
At the end of the line stood Misty. She was clearly meant to be Craig’s female counterpart. 5’10”, blonde, tanned & toned with big D-Cup breasts, she had the stuck up cheerleader look down to an art.
“Ladies, we made special adjustments to The Machine just for you. On top of the height, fat and muscle options the guys have, female contestants can also use their tokens to make 1 inch adjustments to their hips, waist or bust to sculpt the ultimate bikini bod.”
The models dispersed amongst the contestants, giving each one a bag that hung around their neck. Howard pulled open the drawstrings on his and peered inside. Glinting from the bottom of the bag were two growth tokens.
“For the first week, you each get two growth tokens to use however you please at any time. Each week, the remaining contestants will get more and more growth tokens. Four next week; six the week after that, all the way to the final week where the two remaining competitors will each get 20 tokens.”
Howard’s mind reeled as he did the math in his head. Adding up the number of tokens one got each week, the two that made it to the final week each would get 110 tokens, plus whatever else won in the games. Last year’s winner only ended up with about 50 overall. Whoever made it to the end of this was going to be gigantic.
“Throughout the week you’ll all compete in games to test your prowess, both mentally and physically.”
“But this year the winner won’t receive extra tokens, but instead steal tokens from a competitor of their choice.”
“Plus, contestants can also give their tokens to others if they wish to forge alliances and team up against the competition.”
“At the end of each week one contestant will be voted off and no longer have access to The Machine. We keep going until only one remains.”
“Also, in addition to the Million Dollar prize, this year’s winner will also receive... 50 additional growth tokens!”
Fifty more?! Howard thought to himself. He was having trouble even comprehending how big that would make him if he won.
At this point, Tom stopped to introduce each contestant and get a few words from them, Howard was so out of it, he barely said a word for his interview, sputtering out something about “being thrilled to be here.”
Craig, on the other hand, was not at a loss for words.
“Aw man, my life long idol is Arnold Schwarzenegger. Man, when he first won Mr. Olympia he was 6’3” and a huge 235 pounds.“
“And you’d like to give Arnold a run for his money?” Tom followed up.
“Man, when I win, I wanna be so big I make Arnold look like this shrimp here,” he said, motioning toward Howard.
Misty’s interview went about as expected, saying she knew she was already the hottest girl at her school, but wanted to “hotify” herself further so she could become a famous singer.
Once the interviews were over, the lights to reveal the stage they were on was actually the giant living room the the show’s over-sized house.
“The Big Man on Campus house has everything you could ever ask for: a pool, a hot tub, an Olympics-grade weight room to test your growing muscles. Plus our army of designers will be here with new clothes custom tailored to your changing bodies.”
“The only thing we’re short on is bedrooms. Each of you will have to share sleeping space with at least one other contestant.”
Howard, you’ll be rooming with:
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