As she stumbled into the building, the familiar scent of old books flooded her schnoz unwarranted. It always made her want to sneeze. She said her customary hellos to the office officials up front as she was prescribed a late pass under the excuse of "car troubles". "Goodbye student number 155367!" said the automated voice. They always seemed so artificially cheery, it creeped her and a lot of other students out. Probably because they were robots, yeah that was probably it.
Nearly sprinting down the hallways to spare herself an even more harsh tongue lashing than before, Meitnerium came to a stop at the elevator and pressed the 'up' button. Rummaging through her purse, finding and checking her phone for the time, Meitnerium grew impatient. "Come on, come on..." she mumbled. Suddenly the metallic seals let out a soft 'ding' before they opened, revealing a set of glass doors that slid open, and she entered the compartment. Turning to the wall's touchscreen, she held down the 'SHIFT' button and pressed the 1, 2, 7, and 'ENTER' keys.
Slowly but surely, the antiquated elevator started moving upwards towards the one-hundred-and-twenty-seventh floor. "These things are so slow." the young snow-haired student said to herself as she tapped her foot impatiently. It was understandable that they were slow, having such a long vertical trek ahead of them. And sure, the dangers of matter transporters were obvious. But the many other colleges she visited, and subsequently rejected from, at least had escalated elevators that cut the high time of travel in a third...
And boy would that third of a timeslot have been appreciated. Lo and behold, nearly twenty minutes after actually entering the elevator, Meitnerium finally reached her destination. It certainly didn't help that the damndable thing stopped at least seven times so that other students could get on. But rather than bitch about it, Meitnerium would settle for finally getting to her Cosmetology class. It wasn't her best subject, but it always provided a nice cushion should her other career ideas not pull through.
She took a deep breath. No doubt that oversized sow Mrs. Henderson would have something to say about her recent spell of tardies, but she could handle it. Who was she to judge, surely she had trouble getting places on time too with that ginormous body of hers. Meitnerium snorted at the prospect of her teacher having a life, "Poor fat cow can barely waddle around class, let alone go to the club."
"Ahem."
A sultry voice came from behind her. One that she recognized as, without a doubt, Mrs. Henderson. The green pigmented lass turned slowly to face the behemoth of her nightmares, standing three feet away (assuming that her belly counted, it would be a mere half-a-foot) with her chubby arms folded over her stomach. Behind her glasses, a patented glare of malice aimed directly at Meitnerium shone with a distinctly wicked intent. "Miss Perioda." she said in a husky voice, her multiply chinned face frowning deeply, "I don't have time for you today."
Like a good majority of women that hailed from the Saxxonian Galaxy, Mrs. Henderson was a woman of amplitude in all three of her axis. She was inexplicably tall, standing at well over 2 meters vertically and a good meter and thensome in depth. Horizontally she was the average woman, if not a little wider in the shoulders than most, overall giving her a very intimidating appearance and explained why all fat jokes were conducted in her absence. "Why even bother having your Daddy pay for college if you aren't going to attend classes?"
"Oh come on Mrs. Henderson!" Meitnerium pleaded, "Just one more chance, it's only my fifth tardy!"
"This month."
"Please!!"
"No, you're late. Go talk to the dean."
"But I'm only..." Meitnerium peered inside the door's window and checked the clock on the wall. "Five, ten, fifteen... fifty-five minutes?" she counted aloud, "That's pretty damn late!"
"So you see my point."
***
"Stupid, lousy, whale'uva professor." Meitnerium cursed her absent teacher with fervor as she await the arrival of the dean in his office. This was after she had calmed down some, the words were both indescribable and unpronounceable before she had taken a few deep breaths on the long elevator ride up.
"It's not my fault people can't drive!"
"I was only a little late!"
"It's not like I haven't been late before!"
"She should really start expecting things like this!"
"I can't be held accountable for her inexperienced attitude with my style of college attendance!"
And with that, she huffed and crossed her arms over her green bosom and started to pout; her eyebrows furrowed, tongue in cheek, and bottom lip bitten down on. She heard a loud clapping from behind her. "Bravo, Ms. Perioda." the elderly dean said from the entrance, "I think that last one was my favorite, mind if we put it on a poster for College Humor?" he chuckled as his elderly Willixian body shuffled towards his desk.
"Perhaps if you were as prepared as you are clever, you'd be able to get to class on time." Meitnerium rolled her eyes, she had gotten used to this kind of treatment from the faculty around here. Always "if you just did [this]" or "If only you'd [that]", it was really starting to bug her. "Hahaha, yeah." she said curtly, "Look, I know why I'm in here, so can I just go back to class?" she leaned forward slightly, "I mean, if you keep me here, aren't I just missing more class than before."
The smile on the dean's face faded at her impertinence, his cheery demeanor replaced with a disapproving scowl. "It would be wise for you to hold your tongue, Ms. Perioda." he said sharply, "It'd be a shame for those pretty antennae of yours to get ripped off in a futilistic struggle with an old man." she gulped, somewhat intimidated by his sudden threat. While no means a 'scary' man, it would serve to reason that he could do a lot of damage given the element of surprise.
"Now, about your attendance record." he said once cooled off a bit, "It seems that in the last month you've arrived late to class at least 5 times."
She slumped her shoulders, growing a little uneasy in her defense. "Yeah, I have, but today wasn't my fault, I was caught in traffic!"
"I'm aware. That was my nephew, delivering my heart medication."
"Oh."
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