My names Nick Johnson and I am, or should I saw was, 20 years old. I had it all, a great girlfriend, a bright future and, in general, a good life. Then, one day I screwed it all up and this is how I did it.
I was back from college for summer and, as usual, I had hooked up with my old girlfriend Katy. Despite our high school promises, neither of us had stayed exclusive. Both of us had played the field at college whilst we were at college and we were both comfortable with that. Still we always got together for summer and it was always fun.
I had only been back a couple of days and we were lying in my bed after a particularly good session of "catching up". As usual I wanted to sleep but Katy was jabbering on about college and whether she was making the right choices.
"I mean I thought economics and business was the way to go but with the current financial crisis I got thinking that maybe I should think about pursuing law or something else. Its sooooo worrying, I make a mistake now and that’s the rest of my life ruined. Mom’s no help. She's says to go with my heart but that’s easy for her say when she never even worked a day in her life! What you think babe?" Katy rambled breathily. It was a real great way to kill the moment.
"I think you should just chill out and go with the flow" I said with my eyes closed. "It’ll all work out fine. It always does for women"
Katy jumped up in bed, "It always works out for women!" she screeched, "What the he'll do you mean you chauvinists prick?!"
I sighed. Why didn't I just tell her to change to law? "Well it’s just that. I mean take our new neighbor Evette. 25 years old and I've never seen her leave for work. She just sits outside by that pool all day working on her tan" Man she was hot. Best not bring that up with Katy though.
"Or your Mom, she marries your dad at 21, has you, divorces him at 30 and is now sitting pretty at 42 with nothing in her life more taxing than making sure she makes her weekly hair and nail appointments" and is a still a complete bitch.
"Or my buddy Chad's little sister Jenna, 17 years old and her Daddy just bought her a Porsche. Why, is she getting straight 'A's? No, she made head cheerleader" and if the rumors were true she got that by blowing thence principal.
"Or do you remember our high school Spanish teacher Mrs. Mendes, she is retiring at 54 so she can follow her dream and write a cook book. 54 years old! Her husband must be an idiot" although a happy idiot, even at 54 she probably still looks good.
"Or... I don't know... Paris Hilton or any other girl you care to think of." you say
Katy got out of bed fuming and started picking up her clothes. "You don't know anything you jerk!" she said “If you knew what it was like to woman, you wouldn't be saying that"
"Oh yes I would" I was really pissed now she was leaving. “I wish I was a woman. I would love to wake up as any one of those chicks I just mentioned and got to live the easy life!"
"Huh! Careful what you wish for Nick" Katy laughed and left without saying a word.
Meanwhile I went to sleep blissfully unaware that I would wake up as......
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