It was Christmas Eve and Paige and her boyfriend Bobby were in his house home form school for the holidays. They were watching “Miracle on 34th Street” when they heard a loud thump from outside the house. “We need to go see what that is,” Paige said picking Bobby up off the couch and putting him on the ground.
“But what if it’s a prowler,” Bobby asked nervously.
Paige just smiled and made a muscle with her right arm. It was 16 inches around and strained her thin white cotton shirt, with the little red stripes on it. “Don’t worry sweetie, I’ll protect you.” She did up her overalls and threw on her timberlands, while Bobby pt on his Uggs and grabbed his thickest coat.
Outside in the bushes they found a large man in the bushes. He was dressed in red and white and had a long white beard. “He’s dead,” Paige said sadly.
“He looks like Santa Claus,” Bobby observed.
“Well if he was Santa who’s going to deliver all the presents to all the boys and girls then, huh?” Paige mocked before a red and white coat fell down onto her from the roof.
“Paige this is like that Tim Allen movie,” Bobby said nervously.
“You mean the one where he turns into Santa Claus and saves Christmas?”
“Yeah, but I don’t think its going to be funny and cool like that movie he did, um, “Galaxy Quest!” I think it’s gonna turn out dark and disturbing like that other movie he was in, “The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause!””
“Well however it turns out you need to put on the coat and save Christmas,” Paige told him throwing he coat into his arms.
“No way! I’m not turning into Santa Claus!” he told her holding he coat out and away from himself.
“Fine!” Paige said taking the coat form him and throwing it around herself, “I’ll have to save Christmas!”
“But honey,” Bobby began as she watched her buckle the belt around the coat, “What if you turn into Santa?”
“Then I turn into Santa!” Paige said nonchalantly, “But I won’t be the girl who ruined Christmas for everyone!” And just like that Paige’s mind was flooded with images from everywhere.
She saw the following images flash through her mind in no particular order.
• Milk and Cookies
• Names on a list
• Flying in a sleigh
• Breaking into a multitude of homes
• Elves
• Herself stroking a long white beard on her face
• Bobby looking worried as wind rushed around him
• Reindeer
• Presents
• A clock moving slowly even though it was sped up
• Little kids rushing to the tree for presents
• Her mother and father proud of her
• A gigantic gut under her coat
• A workshop at the North Pole
• And finally her bed
Paige woke up the next morning feeling exhausted and when she went to rub her face she could see she was still wearing the coat from the night before. She heard Bobby snoring next to her, and was about to wake him up when she looked own the bed and received her first shock of the morning. “What the Hell?” she screamed out.
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