"Hmmm," says Kltpzyxm. "Maybe that fat cat would be fun." Kltpzyxm snaps her fingers as she prepares to formally meet Cattleya. That rotten mother-in-law of yours continues to wash dishes when she notices pink bubbles forming out of the drain and grunts. The splinter cat giantess leaves the kitchen and returns with a plunger to tackle the problem only for Kltpzyxm to emerge from the drain smiling, prompting Cattleya to scream and grab a frying pan to assault Kltpzyxm with.
Kltpzyxm rubs her head as Cattleya growls at her. "That's a very easy way to give someone a heart attack!" yells your mother-in-law. "Easy Lady," says Kltpzyxm. "Ouch. By the way, you might want to look at the water heater." "I'm calling the police," says Kltpzyxm as she walks to the phone. "I'll have you know my daughter is the sheriff. She knows how to deal with weirdoes like..." Before Cattleya can even grab the phone, Kltpzyxm snaps her fingers and the phone winds up attacked to the ceiling. Cattleya turns her head and Kltpzyxm smiles. "Wow. So you're the guy's mother-in-law. Everyone has in-laws they hate."
Cattleya suddenly is very interested. "How do you know that little cockroach." Kltpzyxm lets out a scoff. "That wet blanket has ruined my fun three times already. By the way, I'm Kltpzyxm." Cattleya lets out a hiss. "Don't get me started. I thought I raised my Maggie not to fall in love with insects. Humans are only good for three things; breakfast, lunch and dinner. Fang was definitely no prize as far as son-in-laws go but at least he was a monster. And Neil's job. I'll bet he only goes there so he can flirt with other monsters. The only thing he has working for him is Sapphire." Kltpzyxm snaps her fingers again and it isn't long before she and your mother-in-law are talking over tea.
"You really hate him, don't you?" asks Kltpzyxm. "Hate him enough to do something about it?" Cattleya lets out a purr as she gives an evil smirk. "I'd like nothing better than to get rid of that pest forever. If Neil wasn't my son-in-law, I'd swallow him with a swig of rum. Perhaps the two of us could take that microbe down a few pegs." Kltpzyxm makes a literal lightbulb appear over her head. "I have an idea," she says. "I'm very good at warping reality. Perhaps I could find a way to hit him where it hurts the most." "Go on," says Cattleya. "Go on."
Kltpzyxm lets out a giggle. "Your Maggie doesn't have much of a taste for humans does she?" "I wish," says Cattleya. "Even before she started dating the loser, she considered humans to be quote un-quote, 'sometimes food'. Fiona may not eat humans now, but she had a good appetite." "Well," says Kltpzyxm with a giggle. "How about we remind Maggie that she married a man lower than her in the food chain. If I can somehow manage to trick your daughter into going black widow, it will be munch, munch, sayonara sucker!" Cattleya purrs at that plan but rubs her chin.
"It's a good plan, but we have to ensure he won't be missed. We have to make Maggie hate Neil somehow. If you can make it look like Neil was cheating on Maggie, she'd go ballistic. Perhaps maybe make it look like he's seeing multiple girls on the side." Cattleya stops to laugh as she drinks some tea. "Maggie would be so mad, she'd kick him out if she doesn't squash him like the bug he is first."
Kltpzyxm and Cattleya laugh wickedly at their two plans. "The only question," says Kltpzyxm. "Is which diabolical plan do we do?"
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