Well, several pieces of ass, given the overall size of said ass.
I don't know if you know this, but it's awfully hard to find things in my size just about anywhere. I mean, I special order stuff online, but that's only really good if you don't have a date two days later. I can't just walk around half-naked in my pajamas all day, even though God knows I would absolutely love that.
I found this really cute green top that somehow manages to be the size of a tent and also make me look hot as holy hell. It covers my whole belly, but it's tight around the lip where it starts to ooze out of my jeans. It's low-cut, so I can show off my breasts without coming off as cheap. Plus these pants made my ass look great. I almost had to fight this really beefy heiffer for them right there on the sales floor, but it was so worth it. My nails look awesome, my hair looks great, and I'll be the first to admit that I would fuck myself so hard right now.
I slip on this cute little black jacket to complete the whole "look" I'm going for. Which I'd like to think is a happy mix between "fun, flirty, and total second-date material" and "hey, you like fat chicks?"
I've been talking to Alex for about a week online. We had the same tastes in dating sites, so that's a start, but we both actually have a lot in common. We both realized we lived in the same area, we both had Friday night free and things just sort of... happened.
I'm actually nervous. Seriously, can you believe that? Me, Mel Carlyle, nevous? It's been so long since I've been on a real date.
Anyway, so I told Alex to pick me up at my mom's house at seven. As the time grew nearer and my heart started to flutter, I heard a knock at the door.
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