You heard the phone at your desk go off and being the good secretary you are you make sure to answer it before the person on the other end can wait for very long. You put the receiver to your ear and the person on the other side belches into their end. It was a belch so loud and gross sounding that you could practically smell it.
"Hello?" You ask, trying to sound as polite as possible.
The person on the other end sounded like they were chewing something, loudly. They smacked their lips and replied.
"Hey, uh, Isabelle. Got a major problem over here. That stupid toilet you installed in my house broke. Again."
You frowned, "Did you remember to flush it?"
"Yeah, maybe I dunno. Listen, you need to get over here pronto and fix this dumb thing, because I gotta take a fat dump soon and if my toilet isn't fixed by then I'm gonna come to your office and shit on your chair!"
They hung up. You tried to hold back your tears, but it looked like you were going to have to be some villager's plumber. Again. And the worst thing was you knew exactly who it was from the sound of their voice. It was...
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