"You see, John," says Ms. Tanaka, "your uncle was actually my chemistry teacher."
"You must've been a great student," you reply. "I mean, if he trusted you with those potions."
She shakes her head. "It was the other way around. He trusted me with the potions, and it made me a great student."
"How so?"
She pulls open her desk and rummages around in it for a bit before pulling out a Polaroid. In it you see an immensely curvy woman wearing a tube top and booty shorts that left nothing to the imagination. She smiles a bit as she notices your wandering eyes.
"Try looking at her face," she suggests.
Blushing, you do as you're asked. The woman's face is smeared with makeup. You squint a little. It almost looks as though...
"That your sister or something?" you ask.
"No, John," says Ms. Tanaka. "That's me."
You look up, baffled. "But you're, your--you--" you gesture at your chest, miming a pair of globular breasts that neither you nor Ms. Tanaka are currently sporting.
"That's right," says Ms. Tanaka. "I'm not an ass and a pair of tits stapled onto a broomstick." There's pride in her voice, undercut by...you think it might be hostility?
"What do you mean?"
Ms. Tanaka shrugs. "Freshman year at college, and Ditzy Daisy Tanaka was the talk of the dorms. My dad basically bought my acceptance to this place, and in exchange I did everything in my power to piss him off. I flunked most of my classes, fucked half the campus, and drank my way into three separate trips to the emergency room."
You're starting to put the pieces together. "So your dad had my uncle--"
She shakes her head. "No, no. My dad didn't know about it. Still doesn't. He just told me that if I didn't get my act together, I'd be out on the street like that." She snaps her fingers. "I was desperate, and I had fucked up my life enough that I couldn't just study my way into a better grade. I could barely add fractions together."
"So--"
"So I panicked and I went to your uncle. Asked him if he had any medicines to make me smart." She smiled. "He did."
"How?"
"A Reverse potion plus an Intellect Drain potion," she says. "Couple of those and I had enough brainpower to thumb through a couple of textbooks and give myself a high-school education in a single day. The next day, I had everything I needed to get through college. By the end of the week, I could have gotten a PhD in any field I wanted."
You nod, not quite sure how to phrase this next question.
"So, why aren't you ruling the world or rolling in Nobel prizes by now? And uh--" you mime having a set of huge boobs again.
Tanaka rolls her eyes. "I'll answer those in reverse order. I willingly shrank my tits and ass because I didn't want to run the risk of turning into a total party animal. I might have been the smartest woman on Earth, but if I didn't go to class, I'd still have failed out of college. It's easier to stay on track if you don't get a lot of male attention. Or female attention, for that matter."
"Okay, but why are you still here and not making a trillion bucks?"
"Because I don't want that." She almost laughs. "Being smart enough to learn entire fields in a night is...intense. My mind was going in a million directions at the same time. I couldn't sleep, I could barely keep my focus on a single topic. Of course, I didn't need to stay focused, but--" she shrugs again. "It gave me a headache. So I dumbed myself back down until I was just a normal genius."
You try to ignore the humblebrag. "Okay, I guess that makes sense," you say. "So, what now?"
Ms. Tanaka looks at you. "You brought some potions here?"
You nod.
"Well, I suppose--"
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