This choice: At least another plateful • Go Back...
“Well, if I eat like this a few times, I won’t be so skinny,” replied Ted, heading back to the steam tables. “I feel like I could eat at least another plateful!”
As you are thinking about following Ted, your dad returns, his pager in hand. "My new boss just beeped me - seems something's happened at the plant and they need me right away. Here's the money for the food." As he says this he hands you some cash. You notice there's more than enough to pay for the buffet - your dad knows you might want to eat more later. “Sorry about this,” he adds, as he heads towards the door. “Grab a cab if you can’t find a bus.”
“Sure, Dad, don’t worry about us,” you say to his departing back. It’s not the first time your Dad has had to attend to an emergency at the plant - and this time, like before, you’ll make up for it in food!
Before you shove your swelling gut back from the table and follow Ted for more food - he may say he’s feeling full, but you’re nowhere near your capacity - the fat waiter comes by. You motion him over.
“My skinny friend is complaining he’s full already,” you say to the waiter. His smile broadens as you go on. “Do you have some tea or something that would help him?”
The waiter breaks into a grin as he replies. “Oh yes sir - a special tea that helps all guys have a bigger appetite. I drink it regularly!” He pats his hefty tum and goes on. “Just make sure he drinks lots of it.” He bows and then positively zips off.
You head off to the steam tables, and when you return, you see a new, larger teapot sitting at the table. You also notice that the waiter replaced the teacups, and filled them with the new tea - a fragrant, sweet-smelling pale green brew. “Make sure you have some tea, Ted,” you suggest to him, as he chows down on his chow mein noodles with pork. “It does help the digestion.” To reinforce your idea, you lift your cup to your lips before digging in. As you set it down, you feel hungrier than before. “Go on, have some, it’s good,” you say to Ted.
“Cheers!” he says, as he empties the cup. “I’m thirsty,” he says, and pours himself a second and then a third cup. “This stuff is good,” he adds, and returns to his plate with renewed vigour. The fat waiter cruises by at that point, and winks at you over Ted’s head.
You and Ted both dig into your food.
As you eat - the beef bourguignon is delicious, as were the onion rings and the lasagna before it - you cannot believe you're still hungry. What's more, you can't believe that Ted, who is far skinnier than you, is still hungry. You look across at Ted and notice that his once flat stomach is starting to pooch out over his belt. Of course, it isn't anything like your belly's massive swag - which is stretching out towards your knees - but on a lean guy it is surprising. Your jeans are getting uncomfortably tight, though.
"Hey, Ted, are you still hungry?" you ask through a mouthful of Chicken Tetrazzini.
Ted clears his mouth of the poached salmon he's been wolfing down, and replies, "I can't believe, but I am. I'll get big if I keep eating like this. My jeans are getting tight!"
As you start in on a plate of veal cordon bleu, the waiter reappears with another cartful of food. You suddenly notice that he looks fatter than he did a few minutes ago. Your jeans are unmercifully tight, so you decide to ask him for a favour.
"Could I borrow a phone? I think I need to call home for different pants."
"Oh, your pants have gotten too tight? Frankly, sir, they looked too tight when you arrived. No need for you to phone. If you look in the closet on the right, I think you'll find some jeans and shirts to fit you better. You too, sir," he continues, turning to Ted. "No sense wearing tight clothes when you enjoying good food."
You stand up, and there's an ominous ripping sound from your jeans. Your belly flops out over the waistband and hangs out an enormous distance - you're used to not seeing your feet, but the size of your belly is now something else. You waddle gently over to the closet - funny how you hadn't noticed it before - and open the door. Inside you find ...
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