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Review #3584528
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Review by Lilithmoon☽ Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: | (4.5)
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Hey E.,

Okay, so my neck is stiff and my shoulders hurt from tensing up all this time. Man I hate this. I think the worst part is knowing it's all going to hit the fan any second now. Arrrgh!

Jesus, I was just actually biting my nails. I don't even bite my nails. See what you are doing to me E? This is really really good. The suspense is killing me.

Reaching over my lap she popped open the glove box revealing a shiny silver hand gun like the one detectives used in those old crime dramas.
P3 S2

Jenna pulled the gun from inside compartment and stuffed it in the waist of her jeans.
P4 S1 (there is a missing word there somewhere)

pulling a police issue Maglight from under her driver's seat. She clicked it on and the beamed washed over my face, blinding me for a second.
P4 S2-3 (need apostrophe; drop "ed" ending)

"I guess it's either over we go."
P15 S3 (missing "or" word)

"Ask Trey. I'm only, like, ten years older than you."
P19 S3

"Anytime...anywhere,"
P22 S1 (needs period not comma)

"You do remember why we're are here?"
P23 S2 (need apostrophe)

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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 09/09/2011 @ 1:15am EDT
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