\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/3584567
Review #3584567
Viewing a review of: {citem:}
Review of  Open in new Window.
Review by Lilithmoon☽ Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Horror, Inc.  Open in new Window.
Rated: | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hey E.,

Man oh man, how the plot thickens. I can't believe old Hap is involved in this. If he is I totally didn't see that coming. This story is so unbelievably good. I can't wait til this is published. You seriously better sign me a copy.

I still have my doubts about Jenna but if she is bad she is really good at playing good. You know what really gets me? Is Neither Trey nor Eddy either one have mentioned there were six extra booms yet. I mean you would think that might prove note worthy when they told Jenna the whole story.

One other thing I'm not real sure of is how have the FBI or state police not been involved if Emily has been missing a month? I have a hard time with that since there was a town meeting you would think that would get big time news coverage.

Is that a loose end you are going to tie up?

"Feels like forever since we were last out here
P3 S1

The smell of a musty, dank odor filled our lungs. Unfortunately, it reminded me of death.
P11 S3-2( The way these sentences are worded sound very awkward to me.)

"We don't even know where these sealed entrances are."
P38 S1

Jenna trained the beam on the latch--a round looped had been welded into it's bracket making the opening of it look impossible.
P43 S4 (drop "ed" ending; remove apostrophe)

"Help me out," Eddy said as he bent over and tucked the tips of his fingers into the ceasecrease of the rent metal.
P45 S1

We all clapped outour hands to our ears until the sound finally faded away.
P46 S3

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go NoticedOpen in new Window..

*Vine2* Answering your request for a review on behalf of "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window.! *Vine1*


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 09/09/2011 @ 3:45am EDT
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/3584567