Hey Bruce,

Great story! I really enjoyed this one. The originality was refreshing and writing was impeccable. The characters are very believable and the dialog is very convincing as conversation between two siblings. Well done.

I love the obscurity of the story how it is slowly revealed layer by layer but then when you go back you can see the little bits of clues you gave the reader along the way. This is difficult to pull off and you did it very well. Bravo.

I know because this was a contest entry you had a word limit but now that the contest is over I would love to see this story expanded upon. As a reader I would love to see the death incident and perhaps some of the parents reasons for never coming to visit. Then of course you could always write a sequel with the parents getting theirs. I would read that.

Anyway, well done. This is a great read and I appreciate you sharing it. I look forward to reading more from you in the future.

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .



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