Review of showering acts of joy



Why I chose this piece I like essays. Newbie review

Overall impression of piece: This is very helpful. I now have grandkids and would like to say this isn't reality, but it is.

Grammatical and spelling errors eleven, three need to be spelled out

What I liked? You have a way of coming along side the reader and guiding them through your thought process and perhaps their own. I am envious of someone that is that good looking by your description. This unfortunately has gone on from the dawn of time. Preadolescence is almost harder then any other time. We had two girls. We know. You catch the visceral things of your daughter's reactions. Very nice

What I disliked: I think you knew she would respond to the visual clues. I would bring the reader into your world and give us more detail. A real mother knows these things. I bet you know

How the piece made me feel: I think beauty is on the inside. Most men are atracted by qualities that just aren't on the outside. Google as teacher is an interesting concept. Could use more of a conclusion. I am sure th e kidding wouldn't stop, but now there is an important difference. She knows

Hope this helps. Use my ideas as your creativity alchemy deems fitting.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Peace and beauty in freefall
MichaelFrom Mountains