Reviews are limited by at least two things: The reviewer's knowledge/background and the author's temperament. Sometimes the reviewer's understanding and interpretation of a piece misses the mark. When the author believes this is the case, he can become hurt or angered. Please don't be. This review is neither a condemnation of your work, nor an extolment. It's just my opinion, nothing more.




While the actually meaning seems a little enigmatic, I can tell from the tone that it focuses on the hardships of the past, and labors on that emotion before finally settling for a somewhat more optimistic view. Actually it seems more like a rationalization and acceptance than optimism.

I do have a few questions/suggestions:

In line One:

Pieces of rain and snow
Pieces of rain and snow? The seems an odd way of measuring the two, in pieces.

Line Three:

Nor lightening blind my vision
If you mean like, thunder, then it should be, "lightning."

Line Five:

Peace reigns here in my fortress of dire
"Dire," is an adjective, but you use it as a noun here. Now, "Dire fortress" would work.

Lines Six and Seven:

My walls cleansed with fire
…And gasoline.

You might want the stronger of the two to come last, “gasoline...and fire.”


I’ve been wet so long I’m dry
It's fun using opposite but I'm not sure how being wet for so long makes one dry.


Despite those questions, the poem does carry with it the sense of someone who feels lost and out of place and is trying to find a place to fit in properly. While I can't with certainty say that the poem is completely open and easy to grasp, as I said earlier, the tone shows a unsettled mind which seems to be asking for clarity, for that chance to finally see things in the right light. For me, that is the strength of the poem, that askance for clarity and insight.