Reviews are limited by at least two things: The reviewer's knowledge/background and the author's temperament. Sometimes the reviewer's understanding and interpretation of a piece misses the mark. When the author believes this is the case, he can become hurt or angered. Please don't be. This review is neither a condemnation of your work, nor an extolment. It's just my opinion, nothing more.




I like the opening stanza:

“Your name?” asks everyone from everywhere...constant repeat
“I am...Nameless...” always my reply...
Someone once asked “Why?” well....

It might not be the most structured stanza ever, but it’s meaning is important and it sets up your theme, which will show all the complexities that make up you, and people in general. You should that asking such a simple question, “Your name?” can require a much deeper analysis, were we to answer it in the most in depth way.

The second stanza sets the boundaries. We know what others say and how this person feels: empty. Loveless, soul and spiritless, and generally, worthless. Now that we know the boundaries of the poem we can read on and see how you either expand on this theme, or attempt to define it and hopefuly come to some understanding of it.

The third stanza, both expands and defines. You are using individual words that one feels to show the complexity of a human being. The speaker in envious of other, they long (quizzically) for a reason to move on, and equally enigmatic, the speaker searches for a remnant of humanity…though I am not sure if from within, or from others.

Stanza four intensifies and continues to add to the picture. It also trends toward the quizzical.

My name is Deceived
I was told, and believed, that life is a treasure

It makes one wonder, who but the speaker him/herself is to blame for this? So for the first time the reader sees the poem as potentially indulgent melodrama. The growing suspicion is intensified, as the speaker declares him/herself to be lost, no longer required, and hatred, I presume for, not from humans, which becomes worrisome for the anger is spewing outward, not inward.
It’s more of the same in stanza five, and the reader is likely to become angry or get a complex, lol. Having already been told that we are hated, we are now the source of contempt, and that the speaker now feels a lack of warmth, and feel their life fading. Being the sourse of hatred ad contempt, the reader must decide how honest the speaker is, and how much of it is just a hurt reaction. The reviewer certainly hopes there is no anger directed toward him, he feels none for the author.

The highlight of stanza six is the speaker’s feeling of hurt. He/she feels no one cares or sees his/her suffering. I can’t say if this is true for those you know, but intellectually I can see it because you’ve written it with hyperbole here.

Line thirty-three adds to our faults: now we must be blind. The list is growing, were this a trial, we’d need a good attorney.


Stanza seven changes the direction of th poem. Tired of being hurt, of feeling a victim, he/she states:

My name is Weak
So I am here to end it

The names that he/she identifies with changes dramatically: Revenge and Vengeance become the hallmarks of stanza seven. And while theline:

And I'm here to save my name

Is clear and states the aim, this one is less clear and more worrisome:

And I am crimson, oozing

It is probably just symbolism, but it suggests harm in one direction or another.


Stanza eight takes on a more positive tone. The speaker feels free, haing escaped from the mold of being a victim. However the last line seems out of place:

Far far away from here...in a world where war doesn't exist

I wasn’t aware that this is an anti-war poem, and worry that you have come to the end of what you have to say. Now would be a good time to sum up and end the poem.


And sure enough, it does seem that you are trying to end the poem, though, it’s a slow process. You’ve reverted back to being submissive. I’m not sure where the strength went, but this shift is too sudden, and anticlimactic.


The final stanza is a depressing one, and not at all in keeping with the progress the poem was making. The poem shifts from an optimistic tone back to the self-involved hyperbole of earlier:


My name is Suicide
A remnant of what I once was
I close my eyes
One last time
On a name...that never was....

It will be interesting to know how readers will react to this poem, and to this ending. Younger readers, I think, will identify best, since their feelings will be most attuned to those expressed here. Whether they will notice the unresolved twists and turns however I don’t know. And a poem that basically says: “Life stucks, you suck, I want to die” really is self-indulgent, though I admit, I think all writing is self-focused. Still, I guess I wanted that optimistic ending, that sign that the speaker would fight, would struggle to define him/herself.


Some of the imagery is good, and you put a lot of work into defining the different names you apply. That is the strong point of the poem, that you put a lot of work into it.