Hello, just to let you know I'm not a Professional, just a writer like you.
OVERALL SENSE
I could picture the two guys sitting under the stars talking to each other. But had trouble picturing what they were wearing. It kept me reading from start to finish, and left me feeling like I wanted more to read.
AREAS OF IMPROVEMENT
said the man I the servants attire.( what?) I didn't understand what you were trying to say here, and would like to.
Favorite lines
“People simply may have never come back to tell the tale,” spoke Varius as a matter of factly. (I like it, because you made one character think outside the box, while the other one is thinking inside the box. Very clever.
Thank you for writing and posting this for me to read. I hope this review helps you and I look forward to seeing more about this story, Maybe? If you write more let me know, I like your story line and want more of it. Mystic Angel