Hi there C.Evil . I am reviewing this entry as a part of "I Write in December-January-February" . Before I begin, please note that these are my views as a reader and are not meant to offend in any manner.

Imagery Created

The poem captured the monster and the impact on waking up clearly. Somehow, I kept on feeling that you were referring to a real situation in life.I tried to find that reference in the lines, but could not. Still, it reminded me of the thousand monsters that sleep in our mind.

Language, grammar and form

You have already got the mistake you made in the form. Grammar and language does not need any change. But if I read the poem without knowing the form, the poem creates the right picture in my mind.

Punctuation

Perfect as per me.
But I have been told that I should not be capitalizing the first letter of every sentence, esp if it if following a comma. You might want to think about it.

Favorites and Not-so-Favorites

The ending para of being released from monster's lair. It breathes the relief and pain at the same time.

Other Thoughts and Suggestions

If you are going to make the changes, retain the original poem. Form or no form, it is really a beautiful poem. I enjoyed reading it.For that, I'm giving it four stars. Thank you for writing and sharing your work.

Keep Writing!


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
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