Slop Bucket Road [E] A true story based on an actual patient. Obviously, the name was changed. |
I selected your story to review through the Read a Newbie Forum of WdC. Thank you for sharing this touching glimpse of your life. And also, welcome to Writing.com where I believe your work will be received with great appreciation. It was a real pleasure reading your story and I am glad to give you some impressions I have of your piece as well as a short review. My review is based solely on my opinion and feelings. While I may suggest some structural alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and impressions about a story in the hopes that they may be of some help and encourage further thought about what has been created. Please take what you think is appropriate for your work and disregard the rest. Overall Impression There are lands and people in America that have similar heritage, but not all are worthy of the insightful tribute you have given the rural medical practice and the unique patients of that country, like the Zipporah Watsons, who thrive there. Your story gave honor to a precious woman’s memory while delivering a stirring story of real life perseverance. Interest and Pace I believe it is the upbeat and down to earth tone of your story that grabs my interest. There is no pretension. The doctor is ready to stand and serve and the prose takes the reader on those early visits; so there is a coming to an eye opening revelation of how medicine serves the public when those who practice it are centered on the welfare of the patient. Your story at times carries the glow of a fable or a myth. Something mankind has heard about, but is cannot actually exist somewhere. Structure and Clarity The structure you use works well for your story as it is not plot driven, but still conveys the essence of one life, Zapporah Watson, whose quality of life increased greatly with the advances in medicine and the care of a compassionate doctor. The dialogue is wonderfully lined out to capture the essence of Zapporah, while building the reader’s expectation that a wonderful relationship is being developed. The interactions between the characters remain clear throughout the piece. And even the introduction of some medical references serves the interest of the story and does not detract from the reader’s interest. Edits/Revisions I did not come across any need for edits or revisions. Summary When Zipporah Watson says, “..git out here right now. I got chest pain,…” Dr. King enters into a relationship with a patient that seemed destined to be on the short side. Along the way we are given the opportunity to see the beauties of rural life in the hills of Georgia. The writing of the story is delightfully varied and professionally done and as a reader I feel I have been introduced to a part of the American community that I should know well, but have seldom visited. Your story was most enjoyable for me to read and it was a pleasure to review. Thank you! ~Kenword~ This review is given in honor of:
Come cast a vote for this years Mr./Miss Thankfulness! 101@101513 My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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