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 Review #3997385 |
 | My dear friend the moon  [E] An ode to the moon  |
| (4.0)| A pleasant hour Kersie   Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! A Greetings from the "Invalid Item" I'm your friend here Samberine Everose .I've found your piece while visiting your Portfolio, so I'm here, giving you a review. I hope I can bring you a smile. Please remember that I‘m not a professional in writing or an expert in reviewing, anything I say here is just only my humble opinion as a reader who just like to read and appreciate the uniqueness of others thru their works. Try to chew and just ignore it, if doesn’t fit to your taste.  WHAT CAN I SAY ABOUT THE:Title: Every title of a piece is so important, it is the captivating part of it, the title should have a magnetic charm that can allure a reader, because it is the first thing in which a reader have their first glance and have their first impression on a piece. The title of your piece is good for me, it is intriguing, it hooked me, I liked how you personify the moon as a friend., maybe it may also symbol as a loyal friend. Imagery - A well crafted words when it was properly used can create a subtle or vivid in the imagery.The proper chosen of words to express or to show intentionally meaning of the piece can create a better imagery that can evokes tone and emotions. The words you weaved is vivid to me, I liked how you properly combined your words which creates an imagery and evokes emotion like sadness, mystery, and loyalty. Rhyme and Rhythm: when it was properly been chosen and properly been used by the words that was intently used can be pleasing to the ear when it read aloud and fun to create.,and even line breaks on the part of rhythm can stimulate emotions and will set the imagery presented. This is not a rhyming poetry, but I liked the rhythm that was created. It blends with the created tone.  MY DOUBT AND SUGGESTION :I didn’t find any words that can distract the flow  I just have doubt and wonder why you didn't capitalized some letter on the given title , And not using some punctuation marks, using Punctuation marks are one of the important tools or equipment of a piece, It helps the piece to slow, to stop and be fast while reading. I've noticed also that you don't used any punctuation marks on the body of the piece. Like on the third line, this is a kind of questioning but you don't used any punctuation.  MY FINAL REFLECTION :Moon is beautiful, it looks deep and full of mystery, like friendship. A good friendship always go deeper like the moon at night. The more you looked it , the more deeper and the more you want to know what's behind it, like friendship. Thanks for sharing your piece and for allowing me to drop some review. I really enjoyed reading and reviewing on it. Hoping to see again more works of yours in the future. Everyone have its own gift and talent, God made us unique. Its within us, if we want to improve and share. So write on, and always share this wonderful talent you have. Until next time. ** Image ID #1979236 Unavailable **  
  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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You responded to this review 05/31/2014 @ 8:31am EDT