Hello, I am PandaPaws and I am reviewing this piece as part of the Simply Positive Group!

How I found your piece...I was going through the Shameless Plug Page and yours was the first I found and I was intrigued by the title.

First impressions...Although I do not usually like just a couplet poem I did find yours very enjoyable.

Was the title interesting...The title was very interesting and after reading the title I decided not to go any further down the list.

Was the content rating appropriate...I think your poem could have been an "e" rating but better to err on the side of caution with the "13+"

Did you use a specific form of poetry...I believe this was a rhyming couplet poem.

Did you follow the form...yes

Was there a rhyme scheme- what was it...the scheme was aa bb cc

Did the rhymes seem forced...I do not feel that the rhymes were forced, every line seemed fine and they fit together very well.

Were words forced to fit syllable count...no.

Was there rhythm and flow...I felt the flow and rhythm were perfect for your poem, it was a fun and great read.

Any errors in grammar, spelling, or punctuation...I noted no errors in punctuation, spelling or grammar.

Things I would change...I don't think I would capitalize every line, I think I would follow general grammar guidelines. I also would condense down the spacing in the lines so that the poem would fit on a page easier and the reader could see more of the whole piece as it is being read.

Favorite parts/lines... These were my favorite lines...

My fortress attacked,

When bravery I lacked,



My kingdom now rubble,

With naught for my trouble,


I think this is a very nice piece. Great Job!


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My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .