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Rated: | (4.5)
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Hello, Paul D
This is a Simply Positive Review! *Bookopen*

I'm also one of the judges at the Bard's Hall. Thanks for entering!

*Laugh* You had me whirling through space at speeds way above my super, zoomer-broom, which is pretty fast, by the way. *Wink*

*Exclaimy* I loved the colorful creativity throughout your story. You brought imagination and imagery to the reader, plus you incorporated all of the prompt words with ease.

Small Observation:

I noticed an abundant use of the word "I." I know it was written in first person POV, but there are ways to combine thoughts to help eliminate too many within the same paragraph.

*Bug* However, it did not distract the reader in a persistent way, because the story was so fast paced and filled with space-aged imagery picnicking amid the antiquities of earthly pleasures. *Earth*

*Tagv* OBTW, that was a sneaky way to highlight another one of your stories. *Smirk* Way to go! Quite an inventive marketing ploy -- I like that. *Thumbsupr*

Good luck with the contest! *Mugv*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch





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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4033540