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 Review #4037486 |
 Greetings!The following are only my personal opinions. Ultimately, you and only you can decide what works best for your item. ==>Cynthia opened the fridge,removed the carton of , and opened it. Cynthia opened the fridge, removed the carton of, and opened it. ==>"Why is it I'm not tired?" "Why is it that I'm not tired?" I must definitely appreciate how you added the technology factor in your story. I was really not expecting that to happen, you know, to store the memory of someone you love to a different body without letting them know. However, I would like to know why she doesn't remember it at first but then as Wilson told her about their past, she completely accepts what he is telling her, is the memory in subconscious part? I found the names quite interesting and the way you molded the story was good. However, what was the purpose of the golden egg? Is it some kind of charm, luck or something that indicates what would happen in the future? The dialogues in your story were written correctly and they did not distract the reader from the story. I liked the title and I am always surprised to read flash fictions because I tend to make things complicated and therefore, cannot write a story within 500 words  Congratulations on your win!    Thank you for allowing me to read and review your story. Write On! Take care and Have a great day! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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You responded to this review 09/10/2014 @ 10:21am EDT