Author:kiyasama
Reviewer:Cobe

Hi. I'm here to give you a review in affiliation with "RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group"  as part of the challenge for "a very Wodehouse challenge" . I picked this piece because it is flash fiction and I'm still finessing my own abilities to write in this style.

In General: I like this. The scene is quick but it has lasting effects on the reader. The subject is high suspense which grabs the reader well and holds them through to the end. It has a beginning that sets the stage, a middle that creates conflict, and an end that has a climax and resolution.

Characters: The sniper is well portrayed, cold, heartless, on a mission ... and yet human, too. He is shown as nervous, worried, and sweating. I almost want him to mutter his own name somewhere because having a name always helps connect the reader to the character.

Voice: 1st person - this is well done.

Word usage: You've kept it short, as flash fiction is supposed to, but there are still words that could be cut without affecting the meaning or flow of the piece. For example:
"My mission is simple – to take down the rebel leaders. From my vantage point on this rooftop, the village looks idyllic and peaceful."

Could be written "My mission is simple - take down the rebel leaders. From my rooftop vantage point, the village looks idyllic and peaceful."
It eliminates three words, which isn't a lot but in flash fiction those three words are really useful.

Hook: This is a high energy piece full of drama even though the action is stationary because of the content. I think it's a great read.

Overall: Very nicely written and put together.

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .