Dear Kirsti,

Your piece was powerful, I felt the determination and dedication to your salvation. I am very happy for you because you are so willing to improve your life; I feel God is directing you.

I liked your opening and how your writing transitioned from one paragraph to the next.

Because you asked for an honest opinion, my suggestions are simple. First of all, I feel (you can disagree) the g in God should be capitalized and the bible authors, for example the m in Mark 10:39 should be capitalized.

Another suggestion: read your piece out loud, to yourself or someone you trust. You just need minor corrections. For example: in section on Baptism first sentence: During my baptism I had an afterlife experience. That way you do not have to use the word experience twice in one sentence.

Keep writing Kirsti, because that is how you will continue to improve!