*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4230893
Review #4230893
Viewing a review of: {citem:}
Review of  
Review by dblameck (David)
In affiliation with House of Sensual Prose  
Rated: | (3.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)

A review for the House of GreyJoy
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


Review of The Morning Walk

First and foremost, thank you for sharing your work . I am not an expert reviewer. I am just another writer, but I know it is the reviews that help us to perfect our craft. My opinions are just that; my opinions. This review is being done for Game of Thrones contest for the benefit of the House of GreyJoy.

OVERALL IMPRESSIONS:

I would love to give you a favourable review. However i did not find this piece of flash fiction to be worthy of much praise. The story jumps around and while i can follow the thoughts there are many glaring grammatical and editing errors.

PLOT & CHARACTERS:

A person gets up early and heads for a walk on the beach. After getting a beer from a local pub keeper she is confronted on the beach by two men in a car. A huge dog comes to her aid. She states that the dog saved her. The characters are not well defined and their dialogue is confusing.

SUGGESTIONS/EDITS:

Some spelling (may be) (a while)

FINAL THOUGHTS:

Spend a little more time editing your story.

dblameck





*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 07/02/2016 @ 11:10pm EDT
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4230893