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Review #4232988
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Rated: | (4.5)
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Hi Jill H. O'Bones Author Icon!

When I was searching for something to review from your portfolio, there were only previews and snippets of novels written by you so I decided to give this one a read. The title of your chapters caught my eye and I wanted to know what kind of a second vow it was and why was the vow called as a deception. The title of your story raised different kinds of questions in the reader's mind as I wondered what could the story be about. The phrase 'Sirelord's Hands' made me curious, wondering who they/it was and what fate was she going to face.

From the title and the short description, I could have never guessed that it could be a story about vampires. To tell you honestly, I hate vampires and vampire stories and rarely read them and do only if they are excellent. The beginning of your chapter was good, it is packed with suspense and hooks the reader to it, wondering from which harm Sara made a deal with Vincent to protect her son and who Vincent was. The characterisation you have here was good, the characters aren't the boring stereotypes and there isn't too much romance (or seems that way) at the moment. The character Margaret was interesting because the reader can see that Sara and she are close but the reader wonders if they are sisters or close friends. There seems to be some connection between Vincent and Sara other than being the vampire that turned her. It might be just me but it might be nice to know in the end.

The plot you have is quite strong and in a very long and the first time, I have found myself interested in a vampire story and I would like to read more of it. The two chapters don't give away anything to the reader but the reader isn't bored and is keeping up with the story. The format of your chapters was neat allowing the reader to read the text without any difficulty, the paragraphing was good.

I love dialogue. I take note if it has any or if it has the character's thoughts. The dialogues did not distract me from the story and from my perspective, it enhanced the work. They were written correctly and were not mixed with other person's dialogues. There was no overuse of dialogue tags.

The overall impression your chapter has on the reader is - I want more! I definitely want to add it to my to-read novels list and must know what is packed for Sara in the rest of the novel. It was very interesting! I have no suggestions for your work, there were no grammatical errors that I spotted.

*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! *Shield2*
Write On!
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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 07/06/2016 @ 4:13pm EDT
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