Greetings {huser:Weirdone-Back in the games }

I am reviewing "Three Weird Sisters--Chapter 1"  today as part of the "The Chapter One Competition." .
THANK YOU FOR INCLUDING OUR MANDATORY PHRASE, "HAPPY SWEET SIXTEEN, WDC!" IN PARAGRAPH ## !


In the interest of clarity, I will be using the following conventions in my review:
Your Words: Bold Black{}
My Impressions as I read: Bold Green
Editing Suggestions:Bold Red

Plot::
We are introduced to three sisters. A man pulls up in a Lincoln town car and talks to Tracy and Sheila who are playing in the rain. He gives Sheila a present and tells her not to open it until after dark, then drives away. They go inside and when Tracy tries to take the present from Sheila it gives her an electric shock.

Hook:
Nice hook in the opening paragraph. The reader is now wondering who the man is and why he is heading to Middleboro.

Characters Development:

Amanda
Tracy
Sheila
Strange man
Mrs. Wade


Dialogue:
I had no difficulty tell who was talking, just by the words the different people used. Excellent job.

Punctuation and Structure:
... little bit startled when she sudddenly (spelling error) started to recite ...

... that your judgement (spelling error) about ...

... that your judgement (spelling error) about ...



Closing Statement
I enjoyed reading the story. You have a nice twist going with both good and evil being within the same family. Thank you for posting.

Starling