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 Review #4318436 |
 | a day in the rain  [E] a poem for Earth Day  |
| (5.0)| Hi Rhyssa It's just me, Ken  , and I'm pleased to read and comment on your work "a day in the rain" on behalf of "Earth Day Challengers" . First Impression/Thoughts: Becoming one with nature. Certainly not a new concept but I love simple elegance of this.  Creativity/Impact:You do have a way of creating an image with your words  . There's a wonderful feel of losing yourself in the moment with this. Excellent work. Message/Theme: Uhhh, Earth Day? Seriously, you've captured the renewal of life through nature and brought us into the moment with you. Technique/Technical Notes: I offer you the following as food for thought and not as criticism. I encourage you to consider what I offer but always follow your instinct and heart. You are the poet. Title: Straight forward. I thought it could have been a little more creative, to catch the attention of readers. The "teaser" line (or description  ) offers an opportunity to add some clarification and can also be a great tool to attract more readers. Again, not very creative but informative. Grammar/Wording: Your language is well thought out to elicit and reinforce your message. Word choice is critical in the construct of images and you did a skillful job in creating this. Form/Flow: Okay - You already know I'm not a fan of free verse because so many do it poorly, never having taken the time to understand what free verse is. I found this flowed well to the point that I could immerse myself in the words. Although purists will disagree, I subscribe to the definition that "Free Verse is a form of Poetry composed of either rhymed or unrhymed lines that have no set fixed metrical pattern but rely on traditional poetry elements." I saw and felt the poetry in your images and lines.  Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: An enjoyable, calming read that drew wonderful images in my mind. It was a simple appreciation of nature that speaks volumes about our connections to life. Thank you for sharing your imagination and talent with me today.Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more. Keep writing! Wishing you all the best for Earth Day 2017, Ken
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You responded to this review 04/22/2017 @ 11:24am EDT