\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4318913
Review #4318913
Viewing a review of:
Image Protector
Wake Up! Open in new Window. [13+]
The Earth needs us. It's not too late. (Form: Quatrains) An Earth Day Challenge Entry
by 🌖 HuntersMoon Author Icon
Review of Wake Up!  Open in new Window.
Review by Sally Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Earth Day Challengers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hi Ken,

It's Sally.

*Earth* This is a review for ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** *Earth*
I wanted to repay your kind review, so I chose to review your entry for the Earth Day Challenge.

Introduction
The title, Wake Up! is fabulous at drawing my attention. Your tag-line stating, 'The earth needs us' secures it. [Should it be Earth rather than 'earth'?]

First Impressions:
Building your poem around the so called expert's tweet is an original idea. The idea that 'climate change is just untrue' angers me so much. Shouldn't these 'experts' open their eyes? You have certainly set out many reasons why they should do just that. A great first impression, Mr Ken!

Technique:
You are rather an expert at form poetry that is for sure. Your five quatrains are metrically secure thus leading to a poem that sounds great as I read it aloud. Your poem flows and comes to a fantastically blunt ending with,
'The earth needs help, not a bulls*** tweet!'. Certainly waking up your reader!

You highlight many of the key climate change issues within your poem. From, 'record heat waves, record cold', to 'record breaking hurricanes' you attempt to 'Wake up' the bureaucracy to this worldwide issue. The repetition of 'record' successfully emphasises the changing world around us.

My particular favourite line, although terribly sad, is,
'Coral reefs, now white and dead'. This is such a cruel, sad result of climate change - the coral reefs dying in mammoth numbers. Coral is not just dying in the warm oceans around Australia or around Pacific islands - we are even seeing types of coral dying around the U.K.

Suggestions:
I have no suggestions of improvement - you are far more apt at form poetry than I. All I can mention is to capitalise Earth in the final line, and the aforementioned tag-line.

And finally:
A wonderful poem that highlights key climate change issues. It 'wakes up' the reader - I only wish the idiot leaders could understand! Well done, Ken. It was a pleasure to read your work!


Sally

for *Earth* ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** *Earth*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/24/2017 @ 10:42am EDT
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4318913