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 Review #4319785 |
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| (4.0)| Hi Stephen Scorer My name is Ken and I'm pleased to read and comment on your work "Invalid Item" on behalf of "Earth Day Challengers" . First Impression/Thoughts: Nicely done. A lovely poem about the coming of spring. I agree - "Whichever season, it is unique."  Creativity/Impact:Yes, this subject has been covered ad naseum by poets but these are you impressions and thoughts. That makes it uniquely yours.  Message/Theme: Uhhh, Earth Day?  Seriously, you've captured the changes that occur and celebrate the "rebirth" of the Earth. Technique/Technical Notes: I offer you the following as food for thought and not as criticism. I encourage you to consider what I offer but always follow your instinct and heart. You are the poet. Title: Straight forward. I thought it could have been a little more creative, to catch the attention of readers. The "teaser" line (or description  ) offers an opportunity to add some clarification and can also be a great tool to attract more readers. Again, not very creative but informative. Grammar/Wording: Your language is well thought out and colorful, bringing to mind the images of spring. I particularly enjoyed "Bluebells rise with delightful chimes." which I found humorous and striking. Form/Flow: Written in Quatrains with an abab rhyme, I thought this flowed well. Your rhymes were solid but I felt you were holding back a bit from really opening up and finding the joy in your writing. Sometimes, just go for it. Let your imagination run wild as with the bluebells.  Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: An enjoyable read that spoke of winter's passing and the arrival of spring. Thank you for sharing your imagination and talent with me today.Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more. Keep writing! Wishing you all the best for Earth Day 2017, Ken
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You responded to this review 04/26/2017 @ 5:53am EDT