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 Review #4515411 |
 | Candlelight Dinner  [13+] A short story about a couple's dinner.  |
| (5.0)| It is my pleasure to read your story. Your story called "Candlelight Dinner" was a thriller/suspense mystery which I thought was well written. This story, with such a simple title, intrigued me, so decided to give you a 'Welcome to WDC' review.  Reader's Reaction: I love your showing your reader, describing what thought is going on in Faye's mind. I feel sorry for her, feeling her fear that her own husband is planning to kill her. Instead of running away, she decided to play the same game, kill before he kills her. What a sad predicament how this marriage has come to such hatred that both are willing to follow though on such an outcome. Where did it all go wrong?  Characters/Dialog: The character, Faye, is well defined. The reader immediately knows where she stands. Don't know too much about Josh, only through Jayne's thoughts we know what he's done. He mentioned the doctor's diagnosis is Faye is Anti-psychotic, and needs to take bills to calm her down. Now the reader is stumped, who should they believe?The dialog is well done. It's drams at its best. A marriage where one or the other person don't trust, and have to be constantly on guard.  Emotion/Mood/Atmosphere: The emotion is accusatory, charging each other of wrong doing.The mood/atmosphere created a feeling of distrust, describing the background and settings, and showing the character's feelings. Who to believe?  Plot & Pace: The plot revolves around the couple's dinnertime. Faye made a stew with a surprise within, and Josh comes home Faye's favorite, “Almond mille feuille, which she just put on the counter with opening. He doesn't encourage her to eat it, but Faye tells Josh to sit down and eat the stew. Who is the impatient one? Right at this moment, it's Faye.The pace moves along steadily, not giving too much away until...  Structure - setting & Imagery: The narrative structure follows the plot through dramatic action as it describes in chronological order the key conflicts, main characters, setting, and events. Favorite Paragraph: "The kitchen is filled with the aroma of cooking. Faye hums as she bustles around the kitchen, preparing for the dinner. A stew bubbles on the stove, and she can see chunks of meat and vegetable bobbing in the pot. Faye slowly upends a mortar over the stew, letting a fine white powder fall into the pot. Faye stirs the pot, making sure no residue is visible, and covers it with the lid. She settles down at the kitchen table and sips a glass of wine. And she goes over in her mind, once again, how she will kill her husband. Before he kills her first. Overall Impression/Conclusion: Faye unends a mortar over the stew, letting a fine white powder fall into the pot." Well, I definitely know it's not flour or corn starch for thickener.The conclusion had a Romeo and Juliet ending, although the love for each other ended a long time ago. It must be increasingly hard to live with each other, one afraid of being killed, so decides to be the first to kill. The other afraid of living with a crazy person, not sure what she has on her mind. I can just feel his fear when he finds out she is not taking her pills as her doctor advised.  WriteOn!  Thank you for sharing your work with us! Jeannie☃️    My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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