Hi Sara,
This is a fantastic story. The tone is formal. It suits the story and plot very well. The reader is wondering if Raju and Kaju's friendship will last. They will read to the last word to find out. The plot is straight forward and moves along logically. The story is about a young boy who learns the real meaning of friendship. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. There is only one line of dialogue, and it is well done and realistic. Raju speaks like a real person. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. Great job.