Hello Neil Clair  ! I've seen your posts on the Newsfeed and in Char's Mental Health Support Group, so I wanted to come over and spy through your port for something to review to send you a virtual hug    It looks like you have quite a few things for me to choose from ... goodie!  I love personal poetry, so that's how I ended up here. And the fact that this piece didn't have any ratings yet  I hope this helps 
 First off, wow. Thank you for sharing these hard emotions. I can't imagine what you had to go through, but I am proud of you for being strong enough to put those things into words. You do a good job in this piece of showing the anger/fear/confusion/pain that you feel, which is the goal of emotional poetry like this. Well done! My favorite lines were: "I am scared to say what made me bruise" and how you rhymed Dory with story at the very end. Those lines bring a nice (though sad) closure to the poem.  The rhythm overall is very good too - I want to read the next line and the next because they flow so well together and feel good when read aloud.
 I had some thoughts on how you could encourage more people to click on and read your item. I really like the title and think it fits the piece well, but the brief description (currently "I want to share my story.") could be jazzed up a bit to entice more people in. You could consider using a line pulled directly from your poem in the brief description area - I do that sometimes if there is a specific line I think is powerful, but doesn't give too much away. In fact, maybe the line "I am scared to say what made me bruise" would be perfect - it gives the potential reader an idea of what to expect, but doesn't reveal too much. The other thing you might edit is the Intro Rating of "Non-E." This Intro Rating only refers to the rating of the Cover Image, Title, and Brief Description, all of which are "E" in your case. Switching that intro rating to E would allow WDC to show your item to more potential readers in searches, etc, and thus get you more reviews in the future 
I really love this poem so much, so my other thoughts for you are related to improving the readability of the piece so others can enjoy it as much as I do. First, I'd encourage you to browse through this guide: WritingML Help. WDC has a cool way of adding interest to your writing through font, text color, size, etc. For this poem, I would recommend centering it on the page by surrounding it with this code: {center}poem here{/center}. Then, I would suggest increasing the font size slightly to either 3.5 or 4. (Let me know if you need more help with how to do this). In my opinion, both of those edits to formatting would enhance the reader experience, which is what makes readers finish reading the poem once they open your item. If they like how it looks on the page, they are more likely to read it at all. Perhaps also adding stanza breaks following along with your rhyme scheme would also help in this regard, but I'm not sure it's necessary.
The last thing I'd encourage you to consider is to take another look at the punctuation of this piece. Punctuation in poetry plays a really critical role to the reader's breath and pace when reading, so making sure that's smooth will help with the overall enjoy-ability. Specifically, I would look at the capitalization at the beginning of each line. My personal preference is to only include capitalization if the word is the start of a sentence, but I know other poets are different, so if the capitalization adds to the structure of the poem for you, then leave it. The other thing would be periods and commas - are there any missing? Or are there too many? Maybe a dash would help convey your meaning more?
I know what you're saying in line 20, but I did stumble while reading it. Perhaps there's a more concrete way you could describe what you mean? Disposed doesn't seem to be the right word, but I understand why you chose it, so please keep it if nothing else fits. I'm very sorry you had to go through all you did, but also happy you found WDC and are able to get your emotions on the page. I find that is sometimes the only way I can process my emotions as well, so I hear you 
Thank you again for sharing and I look forward to seeing you around WDC!
 
 My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!"  .
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Review #4571704
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