\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4614893
Review #4614893
Viewing a review of:
And, nothing but ... Open in new Window. [E]
What happens if you're too truthful? (Humor)
by 🌕 HuntersMoon Author Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Animated Signature for Premium Members
Greetings from
"The WDC Angel Army" Open in new Window.!


This one showed up on Random Reads -- and I have to be honest -- though you wrote it a while ago, I'm reading it today, during a lock-down for a pandemic! This makes it a bit hard to review, given that the words you use lightly are in serious use on a daily basis nowadays. (Not your fault, but the way it is.)

Yep, it's a funny poem about telling the truth. However, underneath the comedy there is the question ... why does the truth have to be hurtful? Why can't people just speak the truth all the time? Is it because 'truth' is actually an 'opinion'? Can't it be expressed kindly anyway? So it's a lot deeper than just a comic verse.

About the poem:
I like the title!

The rhyme scheme and verse structure work well to tell the tale.

In the second verse, I found the transition too quick. I think I'd have liked some examples (maybe a verse) of how you learned that the very early 'tell the truth' rules didn't work in real life. Same with the third verse - maybe an example or two of how you sugar-coated the truth, maybe, before you 'caught' this truth thing?

Er - I may be slow, but I didn't understand the last line! *Confused*

Suggestions:
You've used the word 'killing' -- this needs a higher rating than 'E'.
Not quite sure if it's 'rosey' or 'rosy'.

Thanks for sharing this!
Write On!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *CheckG* You ignored this review. Undo
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4614893