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 Review #4616797 |
 
What a lovely poem! The rhyme and rhythm are indeed sing-song, and reading it aloud feels good!  Suggestions: 1. Instead of 'cherry trees' being ripe, would you like to say 'cherry fruits' are ripe ...? 2. I would like to see you play with the formatting of this poem to match the feel of the words. Maybe color, and some line indents, or some extra line-breaks for pauses ... It would look lovely on the page. Maybe vary the font for some lines, use italics and bold ... let the type flutter around like the butterflies!  3. Please pick 'genres' so that this poem shows up on lists. 4. I'm a little sad about the kids trying to catch them in their nets. I dare say I've caught butterflies, too, as a kid, and even worse, with my fingers. I was careful and I set them free again. But it's now known that this isn't good for the creature -- maybe a line or two about letting them go again or something ...? 5. I like your ending of the butterflies being gone and coming back, but I was also thinking - most moths are nocturnal and would be out then, so nature doesn't have to be sad about the absence of flying creatures! Thanks for sharing this lovely poem!  Write On!  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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