Hi Jace
I am reviewing your work as part of I Write. This contest is a new one for me. It took me a little bit of time to figure out why your piece had only one sentence in it. Visiting the contest link and reading what the prompt entailed cleared it up so it was very helpful that you included a link to the contest in your entry. Finding a good hook is actually one of most challenging aspects of writing and it can take a long time just to come up with the right line to pull in the reader.

With that goal you are attempting in mind. I think that you did a really good job with your opening hook. It gives a hint of what your story will be about and a reader would want to know more after reading it. Just from those lines provided, my initial picture is that your story will deal with rough romance. The mention of Janus suggests some type of untrustworthiness while Cupid gives evokes images of love. There's also that great line that reveals the narrator made a mistake somewhere along the way. I'm curious about your writing process whether this hook was decided when you have your story fully plotted out or if it was midway though.

You may still consider tweaking it a little bit for the contest. While it makes a reader interested in your story I don't know if it has enough draw to get them excited to read it. With so much writing out there it is hard to hold a reader's interest these days. The best hooks that I love reading have a little bit of a shock value making the reader immediately want to know what happens next. With your setup sentence "It is a story old as time" you are removing the possibility that this will be something fresh from your reader's mind. This may be a little bit of a trade off as the phrase "As old as time" has a classic feel to it but its something to considering.

Best of luck with the contest and writing!!

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .