\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4742883
Review #4742883
Viewing a review of:
 
Image Protector
1. Phone Calls in the Dark Open in new Window. [13+]
Three people. Three phone calls. One target
by aracrae Author Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
This is a fast paced first chapter. It could use more showing of emotions and scenery than telling, I have never been to most of the places it tells about and would like more of a sense of being there with the characters. The pace is a bit fast to get much of a sense of the characters too. Don't feel that just because you set off at a run that you can't take a few breaths and put in some showing details so we can catch our breaths and get into the characters heads. Right now all the characters are to me is several shades of panicked and frantic. Not all of them should or would be yet. Nothing really has happened for them to be frantic.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/08/2024 @ 2:29pm EDT
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4742883