I Dare You [ASR] A long day's journey under pressure. |
Greetings from the House of Mormont! By participating in a Writing.com activity called "Game of Thrones" , I am in no way endorsing the GoT franchise or identifying as a fan thereof. I’m here to help my team win I found this story in the “by online authors” sidebar and figured I’d already found one good story there today and I might as well read another. This was excellent. You set the scenes clearly and gave us a relatable handful of kids having an adventure in the summer heat alongside a new highway. I’ve seen many a newly widened road in my day, and I could picture everything well. I couldn’t wait to see if the kid made it out safely, though with the first person perspective we can assume he probably gets out alive. It reminds me of an old short story in one of my literature classes, Through the Tunnel by Doris Lessing. You have brought the same basic idea into a much more modern, simple and interesting tale rooted in accessible reality. The onomatopoeia of the trucks thundering across the road creates tension and sets up unnerving potential, and the final moments where he says he wouldn’t wish it on his worst enemy and then insists Danny do it too That’ll be a lesson for Danny boy, hopefully. Your youthful characters remind me of a teen band I put together for a contest entry recently. A fun and classic story that was a pleasure to read. Your formatting is great, and I can’t see anything to suggest for changing here. Thanks for sharing, take care and keep writing The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. "The WDC Angel Army" My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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