%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Review #4744421 |
 | Bobby-Q  [E] A tourist needs directions. Writer's Cramp Entry. 25 lines  |
| (4.5)| Hi Gratefully IE , This review was written on behalf of House Targaryen as part of "Game of Thrones" ! Disclaimer The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. What I liked:  This poem is incredibly funny. It's given me a proper belly laugh this morning. I've been reading through all the entries for this prompt, and I can see I made the right decision not to enter. I don't think this English woman could have competed with so many people who know first-hand how the accents should sound. And it is the accents that make the poems so funny. Some of the phrases you have used made me laugh. This, though simple, cracked me up: "I might could hep wit’ dat." I love that. I love how your last line reads, "Hey! Where y'all going'?" That's great. Unsurprisingly, the people looking for Bubba's haven't understood the directions. I can't say I blame them. The reason the person gives for Bubba's Corner being so called is hilarious. It is because the name Bubba's In The Middle of the Block doesn't have the same ring to it. I love how the person giving directions finds this hilarious and says, "Hehe thass a knee slapper! / I crack m'self up." You crack me up, too! What makes this poem so brilliant is how real the voices sound. I could picture and hear the Southern person speaking. You've done a great job with making your readers feel they know this person. Additionally, your speaker describes how good the BBQ smells, and my mouth is watering just thinking about those ribs. Your speaker says, "Mmm mmm I ken taste ‘em now." Me too!Suggestions: There is one place where I wasn't sure whether the word is a typo or a Southern word I don't understand. "Onct ya'll get ta ol’ Cozy’s" Is this a Southern word, or is it a typo? Should it be "once"? I don't know. Also, the one place I felt the rhythm was a little off was, "Bubba’s place be d’reckly acrost from Cozy’s" "d'reckly acrost" is where the issue lies. The words read as a little uneven, compared to the rest of them. Parting comments: I have enjoyed reading your poem very much. I needed a good laugh this morning, and that is exactly what you have given me. Thank you. Choconut   My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
|
|||
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
You responded to this review 04/13/2024 @ 11:05am EDT