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 Review #4744748 |
 | These Are The Times ....  [ASR] A young man needs to learn the wisdom of patience in the face of his convictions.  |
| (4.5)| Hallo, oh ye fellow dragon, JACE ! I will be reviewing your work "These Are The Times ...." for "Game of Thrones"  Content: Set in the year of our Lord, 1775, and written for the site's official Short Shots contest, this story follows the journey of a young man in Colonial America, who seeks to rectify the series of injustices he is forced to witness. However, a clash of ideologies with his family (father) leads him to make some rather tough decisions. Pluses: I have to marvel at how well some of you writers are able to write so well in the tone and dialect of specific time periods. You pulled that off effectively because it actually felt like I was reading some piece of factual historical documentation. And to be honest, such historical fiction puts me to sleep, but with such an opening paragraph, and perhaps thanks to PBS America running in the background talking about this very same subject, I just had to plod on. You bring Joshua to life with your storytelling. You allow the readers to feel every pent-up emotion; the passion, the rebellious streak, the willingness to do what needs to be done - darn the consequences. I also liked how you were able to weave the events of the time within the story without tiring the reader or making it seem like you were reading an actual textbook. We are taken into the daily lives of those who lived in that era and what they must have experienced; all through the eyes of the Fitch family. From Joshua to James and Eliza, each personality is presented well and an excellent depiction of their times. Suggestions:Here are a few things I noticed while reading. Please remember that these are only my suggestions/opinions and it's ultimately up to you to choose what works best. >>wanted to go down to (the) barracks >>Eliza took her son's hands in hers, a measure that always tended to calm her son. (reading this a couple of times, it did sound a bit redundant. Consider the use of his/him to replace the underlined phrases)   Aside from the little nitpicky notes above, this was a wonderful read. Thanks for sharing this piece with us, and keep on writing!   Disclaimer: The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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