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 Review #4747550 |
 | Welcome Back to Me  [E] Understanding isn't always attained through rational thought. Unused Idol alternate.  |
| (4.5)   I hope you find my comments helpful. Please use this link to see how I rate an item."Comment-In-A-Box" HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY! The opening sentences of this story pulled me in. There is an unmistakable sense of conflict. Is she questioning his love, or her own? It's what made me read on. You have filled this short piece with excellent description, making it easy to 'see' the characters as well as the story world. It is those descriptions that made me feel like I was 'seeing' the story as well as reading it. I'll list some of my favorited places here. 1. t had all been such a blur -- their whirlwind honeymoon had taken them halfway across Europe in 24 days. England, France, Holland, Switzerland, Germany, Austria, Italy, and finally, Greece, had flashed before their eyes, now little more than Cliff-Notes summaries of centuries passed. This is excellent description, as well as backstory, showing the reader where this couple has been during their honeymoon. My wife and I returned from Greece five days ago, so this description resonated with me. We visited many ancient sites and came away with small bits of information--Cliff-Notes as you so perfectly put it. 2. He smiled and motioned to the horizon line with his finger as the big ball of fire rippled and began to merge with the cool of the ocean. The clouds above stretched out in brilliant rays of yellow, very vivid description of the sunset. 3. Waves chased each other in refreshing rhythms at her feet. Thunder crashed along the rocky shore, the sound merging in her ears to meet the distant static that had risen from the uniform bumpiness of the far-reaching expanse. The only thing I can saw about this is WOW! Beautiful description. You wrote: She considered how infrequently he had lived up to her expectations as she pondered her future with apprehension. Finding no easy path, she glanced across the waves and casually looked in the direction in which he had pointed. Once again, it did not meet her expectations, for she found it to be absolutely beautiful. This paragraph confused me. The couple is on their honeymoon, and they are visiting some very exotic and beautiful places, but yet she is dissatisfied? Maybe I'm missing something here, but I wondered why she had these doubts. Final Thoughts: This is an interesting story, even though at one point I was a bit confused. But I like the way the story ends, with the narrator finally filling with optimistic excitement, and he simply with love. Thank you for sharing your writing. Bikerider This review has been submitted to "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Disclaimer: The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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